#ak

A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#like #pancake #syrup #trap #waffle

You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don't want to eat the fish, they just want to make it late for something. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#eat #fish #fishing #go #just

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#buy #cake #candle #got #holder

Do you think I am standing here, making this up as I go? I am sorry to disillusion you. I am not Robin Williams. I am the king of the pen. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#disillusion #go #here #i #i am

I'd like to get four people who do cart wheels very good, and make a cart. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#four #get #good #i #like

I'm gonna fix that last joke by taking out all the words and adding new ones. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#fix #gonna #i #joke #last

What we did in our childhoods makes us who we are now. ↗

— Jon Heder

#did #makes #now #our #us

As far as I know, Vera Miles had a terrible time with Hitchcock, and she wanted to get out of the contract. He didn't let her. She did 'Psycho,' and I believe, if you look at 'Psycho,' there isn't one close up of Vera, not one. After that, she would never even speak about him to anyone. ↗

— Tippi Hedren

#after #anyone #as far as #believe #close

Honest to God, all my life I have had such a fear of spiders. In fact, I use to have a reoccurring dream about one. Very clearly, it was black with a red head. It would sit up in the corner of the bedroom and when it started getting closer, I would wake up in a panic. ↗

— Tippi Hedren

#bedroom #black #clearly #closer #corner

I didn't think any amount of money was worth something that would take away what you believed in or what you stood for. I didn't want to do something my parents and daughter couldn't be proud of. ↗

— Tippi Hedren

#any #away #believed #daughter #i