#ale

He had lost Will Herondale. And he did not know if he could ever get him back. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#will-herondale #will-herondale

It doesn't matter what clothes you had or what shoes you had, or how cool you were, or how many Facebook friends you garnered, what will matter in the end is what weapons you had, how many zombies you killed, and how long you survived. ↗

— Caleb Eversole

#caleb-eversole #funny #humor #zombies #funny

The big male gestured to a chair in the corner. "Mind if I sit?" She nodded her acquiescence. "Go right ahead. That chair has seen more tail than a rock star lately. ↗

— Elisabeth Staab

#funny-humor #siddoh #funny

Hunger Games and A New Hope: Hero rises up from the poorest place in the galaxy. Put through some challenges. Finds romance and a side-kick. Somebody dies. Check Catching Fire and Empire Strikes Back: Totalitarian government strikes back, some other people die, and the rebellion starts gaining momentun. Mockingjay/Return of the Jedi: Bunch of minor characters die, and then one major one. Rebellion wins, if in an unexpected way. Characters all get married. I think Suzanne Collins has some explaining to do. ↗

— Caleb Eversole

#funny #humor #hunger-games #star-wars #funny

We're all headed for the junkyard. But not me. When that time comes, I'm crashing into the car dealership. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #junkyards #trash #funny

A man with nothing to sell is the most unprincipled of self-promoters. The only thing of value he has to offer a woman is his clothes. ↗

— Bauvard

#humor #nudity #principles #salesmen #self-promotion

There are wonders to behold in our world that few will ever experience…Wonders capable of providing an artist inspiration for a lifetime; Wonders to make the world into a place of beauty, and wonders that show us the connections we all share. We each enter our lives like a drop of water into a still ocean, spreading out with each experience in waves, touching the lives of each and every person we meet; and they, in turn, share their lives and experiences with us. ↗

— Alex G. Zarate

#cat-rule-chronicles #echoes-of-innocence #linked #ripples-of-mind #beauty

If all the girls attending [the Yale prom] were laid end to end, I wouldn't be at all surprised. ↗

— Dorothy Parker

#harvard #humor #innuendo #naughty #yale

Isabelle snorted, "All the boys are guy. In this truck, anyway. Well, not you, Simon." "You noticed," said Simon. "I think of myself as a freewheeling bisexual," added Magnus. "Please never say those words in front of my parents," said Alec. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#bisexual #cassandra-clare #city-of-lost-souls #funny #gay

This was not a fairy-tale castle and there was no such thing as a fairy-tale ending, but sometimes you could threaten to kick the handsome prince in the ham-and-eggs. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#happy-end #humor #humor