#awesome

It’s impossible for me to applaud your successes when my hands are too busy patting myself on the back. But if I clap for you, and you pat my back, we can both feel like winners.
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— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #humor #random #random-thought

He felt split in two, one crazy man eating hair and one rational man watching a crazy man eat hair. He chewed and swallowed the last pieces of his father's life. He felt like he was building a museum of pain, a freak show, where he was the only visitor viewing the only mutant screaming the only prayer he knew: Come back, Daddy. Come back, Daddy. Come back, Daddy. Come back, Daddy. Come back, Daddy. Come back, Daddy. Come back, Daddy. Come back Daddy... ↗

— Sherman Alexie

#beatiful #death #grief #death

Did those nice church ladies come by again?" He nodded. "I asked them if a man died and then the woman remarried, and then the three of them met in heaven, would it be a sin for them to have a threesome, since they were all married in God's eye. And they decided they were late to be somewhere else. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#ascanio #awesome #church #funny #hilarious

My name is Nicomo Cosca, famed solider of fortune, and I am here for dinner. ↗

— Joe Abercrombie

#humor #humor

To seek greatness is the only righteous vengeance. ↗

— Criss Jami

#envious #envy #excellence #greatness #jealous

...the sounds next door served as a kind of trip wire: I seemed to stumble and fall on my face, skinning and bruising myself here and there and scattering my emotional and intellectual possessions. There was no point in pretending that I had not fallen, for when we are stretched out in the dirt we must pick ourselves up and brush off our clothes. This then, in a sense, is what I did, reviewing my considered opinions on marriage, constancy, man's nature, and the importance of love. When I had picked up my possessions and repaired my appearance, I fell asleep. ↗

— John Cheever

#love

We just did an awesome job of not dying. ↗

— John Green

#good-job #surviving #awesome

I'd rather feel something for real than pretend it's not what it is. Which Zen guy said "If you want to drown, do not torture yourself with shallow water"? ↗

— A.S. King

#great-story #teenage #young-adult #young-adult-fiction #zen

I had to do something special coming in. I didn't do it, so I had to do it in the playoff. Winning the Mercedes is awesome. Winning three times is a dream come true. ↗

— Stuart Appleby

#come #coming #dream #had #i

I don't like staying in hotels. I like to be in my own bed. San Diego as a city is really awesome. The only hard part of it for me is that I'm away from my family and my house. But as far as shooting down there, we get amazing locations, and the crew is really, really stellar down there. They are really fun. ↗

— Kristen Bell

#as far as #away #awesome #bed #city