#ay

Do you remember back at the hotel when you promised that if we lived, you’d get dressed up in a nurse’s outfit and give me a sponge bath?" asked Jace. "It was Simon who promised you the sponge bath." "As soon as I’m back on my feet, handsome," said Simon. "I knew we should have left you a rat. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#clary-fray #humor #jace-wayland #simon-lewis #humor

That does it," said Jace. "I'm going to get you a dictionary for Christmas this year." "Why?" Isabelle said. "So you can look up 'fun.' I'm not sure you know what it means. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#fun #humor #isabelle-lightwood #jace-wayland #humor

Investigation?" Isabelle laughed. "Now we're detectives? Maybe we should all have code names." "Good idea," said Jace. "I shall be Baron Hotschaft Von Hugenstein. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#investigation #isabelle-lightwood #jace-wayland #joke #humor

Just because you call an electric eel a rubber duck doesn't make it a rubber duck, does it? And God help the poor bastard who decides they want to take a bath with the duckie. (Jace Wayland) ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#humor #jace-wayland #humor

Well, I’m not kissing the mundane," said Jace. "I’d rather stay down here and rot." "Forever?" said Simon. "Forever’s an awfully long time." Jace raised his eyebrows. "I knew it," he said. "You want to kiss me, don’t you? ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#jace-wayland #simon-lewis #humor

It's not gray," Clary felt compelled to point out. "It's green." "If there was such a thing as terminal literalism, you'd have died in childhood," said Jace. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#gray-book #humor #jace #humor

A diary with no drawings of me in it? Where are the torrid fantasies? The romance covers? ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#diary #humor #jace-wayland #sarcasm #humor

I don't want tea," said Clary, with muffled force. "I want to find my mother. And then I want to find out who took her in the first place, and I want to kill them." "Unfortunately," said Hodge, "we're all out of bitter revenge at the moment, so it's either tea or nothing. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#hodge #humor #revenge #sarcasm #tea

Trains are great dirty smoky things," said Will. "You won't like it." Tessa was unmoved. "I won't know if I like it until I try it, will I?" "I've never swum naked in the Thames before, but I know I wouldn't like it." "But think how entertaining for sightseers," said Tessa, and she saw Jem duck his head to hide the quick flash of his grin. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#humor #jem-carstairs #teasing #tessa-gray #will-herondale

Aren’t they supposed to be hiring someone else to train me full-time anyway?” “Yes,” he said, getting up and pulling her to her feet along with him,“ and I’m worried that if you get into the habit of making out with your instructors, you’ll wind up making out with him, too.” “ Don’t be sexist. They could find me a female instructor.” “In that case you have my permission to make out with her, as long as I can watch. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#clary-fray #humor #jace-lightwood #humor