#bastard

I am a bastard, too. I love bastards! I am bastard begot, bastard instructed, bastard in mind, bastard in valor, in everything illegitimate. ↗

— William Shakespeare

#love

He was the sort of person who stood on mountaintops during thunderstorms in wet copper armour shouting "All the Gods are bastards." ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#bastards #copper #during #gods #person

Almost in every kingdom the most ancient families have been at first princes' bastards. ↗

— Robert Burton

#ancient #bastards #been #every #families

I've got kids that enjoy stealing. I've got kids that don't think about stealing one way or the other, and I've got kids that just tolerate stealing because they know they've got nothing else to do. But nobody--and I mean nobody--has ever been hungry for it like this boy. If he had a bloody gash across his throat and a physiker was trying to sew it up, Lamora would steal the needle and thread and die laughing. He...steals too much. ↗

— Scott Lynch

#locke-lamora #stealing #thieves #tolerance

I decided to masturbate with shampoo instead of conditioner today. Because yolo. Things Jesus never said. ↗

— Dave Matthes

#bastard #booze #comedy #conditioner #crack