#bi

I’m not opposed to new people, I just don’t like their packaging (diapers). ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #funny

His high spiced wares were made to sell, and they sold; and his thousands of readers could as rationally charge their delight in filth upon him, as a glutton can shift upon his cook the responsibility of his beastly excess. ↗

— Charles Dickens

#food #newspaper #readers #responsibilty #food

In the bible it says you have to forgive seventy times seven. I want you all to know, I'm keeping a chart. ↗

— Hillary Rodham Clinton

#forgiveness #religion #forgiveness

When someone says so-and-so’s opinionated, what’s that mean? Aren’t we all opinionated? Show me one person with no opinions, and I’ll show you a bowl of Jell-O—or a politician, whichever one’s dumber.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #politicians #politics #random

Every sex noise can be converted into a note and frozen in a can of soda. Ask me about menstruation music today! 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#convert #drink #frozen #funny #humor

My shadow falling over a spot of land always increases its real estate value. Buy it now, because at high noon, all value will vanish.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #noon #random #random-thought

Birdsong foamed in the hour-before-dawn garden. ↗

— David Mitchell

#nature #nature

If you really want to eat, keep climbing. The fruits are on the top of the tree. Stretch your hands and keep stretching them. Success is on the top, keep going. ↗

— Israelmore Ayivor

#actions #believe #believe-and-achieve #climb #eat

In your daily life, let your destined visions be farther than your gifted sight and your ultimate joy be vibrant than your demeaning worries. Think big, dream big. ↗

— Israelmore Ayivor

#daily-life #demeaning #destined #destiny #divine

Anytime you feel like you don't have any work to do, just look around. Look for what God had started doing and ask for his permission to assist him in doing it. ↗

— Israelmore Ayivor

#arcbishop #ask #bishop #christ #clergy