#boy

Me: “Ngh” Cal: “Well put.” ...... Every Boy's Got One ↗

— Meg Cabot

#funny

Well, first you have to be very, very funny. I have realized that it is essential for a boy to be funny. Otherwise, what is the point in a boy? ↗

— Jaclyn Moriarty

#funny #funny

Just when I think you’ve hit bottom you continue to amaze me,” Kyle said. “Or, does this get worse? Nothing would surprise me after this. Are you sleeping with a married man whose wife is dying of cancer?” Elroy didn’t think he’d done anything wrong. “I know nothing about his wife, or his husband for that matter. I don’t ask and I’m not out to break up his home. Lighten up, man. Everybody does it. It’s not like I’m going to freaking marry this dude. I’m only having a little fun with him. You wanna come with me? We’ll have a three-way. You should see the way this guy moves. It will blow your mind.” With that remark Kyle shoved his hands into his pockets and walked faster. “No, thank you. That’s not something I’m interested in doing. Meeting nice, decent people is the only thing that blows my mind. I just hope you’re using condoms, you goddman asshole. ↗

— Ryan Field

#gay-erotica #m-m-romance #rakes #the-ivy-league-rake #home

Look, let me just say it: He was hot. A nonhot boy stares at you relentlessly and it is, at best, awkward and, at worst, a form of assault. But a hot boy . . . well. ↗

— John Green

#humor #humor

Boys. I'd turn gay if they weren't so sexy. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#humor #humor

And Nate? You kiss like a slobbering dog, you have bad breath, and you wouldn't know how to punch the right buttons on a girl if we came with manuals. Happy Thanksgiving, Jackass. ↗

— Elizabeth Eulberg

#humor #sassy #humor

Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them. ↗

— SIERRA

#humor #stupid #humor

Glasses are for people that sips instead of drinks. ↗

— Kai Starr

#drinking #humor #humor

A hug a day keeps the bad boys away. ↗

— Jim Anderson

#day #hug #humor #inspirational #humor

John, let me make one thing clear,” Jim said, cutting me off in his most stern, evangelical voice. “Every man is blessed with his gifts from the Lord. One of mine happens to be a penis large enough that, if it had a penis of its own, my penis’ penis would be larger than your penis.”..... ..."Fuck all of you,” John retorted. “You don’t even exist. We’re all just a figment of my cock’s imagination. ↗

— David Wong

#hilarity #humour #penises #stupid-boys #imagination