#clair

God, you’re uptight. Did the aliens maybe forget to remove your anal probe? ↗

— Cherise Sinclair

#erotica #to-command-and-collar #erotica

Oh lord and master. High muckety-muck. ↗

— Cherise Sinclair

#erotica #make-me-sir #erotica

You dumb-ass ape, get your hand off me. What—are you the first in your family to be born without a tail? ↗

— Cherise Sinclair

#erotica #make-me-sir #family

I don’t need a big house to raise a family, I only need you.” Alex smiled, kissing her on the forehead. “Well, why didn’t you tell me that to start with? We could have saved a lot of money,” he teased. ↗

— Loni Flowers

#clair #family

God, I needed you," he murmured. "I can't even tell you how many times I thought about this. The funny thing is, I don't need you any less now. I think I need you more." ~Shane~ ↗

— Rachel Caine

#funny

I'm worried he's going to...do something crazy." "He lives in a hole in the ground, dresses funny and occasionally eats his assistants," Eve said. "Define crazy." Claire closed her eyes. "Okay. I think he wants to put my brain in a jar and wire it into the machine." Dead silence. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#eve-rosser #myrnin #funny

How'd you get to be so good at this?" "I had a good teacher." "Better not have been Myrnin or I'll have to kick his predatory ass." "I mean you, dummy." "Oh. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#funny #ghost-town #humor #morganville-vampires #myrnin

She was staring at you.’’ ‘‘What can I say? Irresistible.’’ ‘‘Shane, it’s not funny. I just—you should be careful.’’ ‘‘Always am.’’ Which was an absolute lie. Shane’s eyes fixed on hers, and she felt a burst of heat inside that crept up to burn in her cheeks. He smiled slowly. ‘‘Jealous?’’ ‘‘Maybe.’’ ‘‘No reason. I like my ladies with a pulse. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#feast-of-fools #morganville-vampires #shane-collins #funny

I started down but Sam caught my arm and knelt down himself to look. "For crying out loud," he said. "It's a racoon." "Poor thing," I said. "It could be a rabid baby-killer," Cole told me primly. "Shut up," Sam said pleasantly. ↗

— Maggie Stiefvater

#funny #grace-brisbane #prim #rabid #racoon

I think so,” she [Claire] said. “Just watch your back, okay?” “Nah, Michael’s got mine.” He [Shane] looked straight into her eyes. “I’ve got yours. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#eve-rosser #funny #ghost-town #humor #michael-glass