#dates

I've been on so many blind dates I should get a free dog. ↗

— Whitney M. Young

#blind #dates #dog #free #get

First dates are like homeless vagrants: despite all efforts to avoid them, they’re always at McDonalds and you end up without any spare change. ↗

— Bauvard

#first-dates #funny #homelessness #love #change

Don't answer the door in a wedding dress and veil, he might not think you're joking. ↗

— Amy Sedaris

#jokes #relationships #romance #dating

I sound contemptuous, but I am not. I am interested--intrigued even--by the way time erases real lives, leaving only vague imprints. Blood and spirit fade away so that only names and dates remain. ↗

— Kate Morton

#history #life #names #people #spirits

Did I mention you're going to have to drive on our date?" I asked. "Cheap bastard. ↗

— Patrick Carman

#thirteen-days-to-midnight #dating

Dates are convenient hooks on which we can hang our memories of events. But history is all about people - people like you and me who did things to change the world. ↗

— Joan Lowery Nixon

#events #history #memories #people #change

Screw technicolor, red, and foreign languages. I dream in status updates. ↗

— Fierce Dolan

#dreams #foreign-language #status-updates #technicolor #dreams

I am not interested in being set up. I need to be ambushed, caught unawares, like some sort of feral love-jackal. I'm too self-conscious otherwise. I feel myself trying to be charming, and then I realize I’m obviously trying to be charming, and then I try to be even more charming to make up for the fake charm, and then I’ve basically turned into Liza Minnelli: I’m dancing in tights and sequins, begging you to love me. There’s a bowler and jazz hands and lots of teeth. ↗

— Gillian Flynn

#dating #dating

The idea that you can merchandise candidates for high office like breakfast cereal - that you can gather votes like box tops - is, I think, the ultimate indignity to the democratic process. ↗

— Adlai E. Stevenson

#box #breakfast #breakfast cereal #candidates #cereal

Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid. ↗

— Frank Zappa

#boring #bunch #dates #deadlines #decorate