#hea

I know the path by heart, by heart- a funny expression, so true. My heart knows right where to go. ↗

— Cynthia Hand

#heart #love #unearthly #funny

Once I started I couldn’t put it down. It was so addictive . . . like a train wreck. ↗

— Katie Klein

#cross-my-heart #funny #jaden-mcentyre #katie-klein #parker-whalen

…breaking the heart of someone you still love is a rare horror, not funny to anyone, except perhaps Satan…and even his pleasure would be spoiled by not having had a hand in it, by the dumb, wasteful accident of the thing. The Devil wants meaning just like the rest of us. ↗

— Glenn Duncan

#love #meaning #the-devil #funny

I find it funny that you could pass the same person on the street, in a store, or even in your neighborhood many times before actually meeting, thinking you’ve never seen them before, but when you are finally introduced, they seem to pop up everywhere. ↗

— Courtney Giardina

#heartache #inspiration #love #romance #strength

Love is a fairytale blah, blah, blah. ↗

— Jessica Fortunato

#fairytale #funny #heart #love #sarcasm-humor

I offered you a choice, and you took it." I shot him what I hoped was a truly scathing glare. "Some choice. I was dying. Some drunk shot me from a pickup. Why wouldn't I have just woken up with gonorrhea like every other girl of loose moral fiber? ↗

— Molly Harper

#funny #gabriel #gonorrhea #jane-jameson #molly-harper

He treats the person as if they were fully whole. We become what others expect us to be. Dad expected me to get better and even assumed I would have something helpful to say. Funny how we rise and fall to the assumptions of others. ↗

— Nathan Foster

#dad #healing #transformation #wholeness #funny

Mortgages are the best way to get people thinking about the afterlife. Corporate realty is an eternal corporeality. ↗

— Bauvard

#heaven #humor #mortgages #real-estate #funny

Good cheaters always have honest intentions towards each other. It is what makes a fair advantage possible. ↗

— Bauvard

#fairness #funny #humor #funny

Peaches found herself wondering if Mary, a tiny brunette with an unprepossessing manner and less than ‘stellar’ work ethics, had to play Where’s Waldo to find Steve’s dick beneath his gigantic waistline. ↗

— A.T. Hicks

#funny #outrageous-behavior #penis-size #funny