#hum

[Eric:] "I'm hoping that the more you see me, the more I'll grow on you." [Sookie:] "Like a fungus? ↗

— Charlaine Harris

#humor #sookie-eric #sookie-stackhouse #humor

Just because all the rats are gone doesn't mean I trust the rattlesnake that got rid of them. ↗

— John Steiner

#social-commentary #humor

But with man the case is otherwise, in that when logic leads to any humiliating conclusion, the sole effect is to discredit logic. ↗

— James Branch Cabell

#humor #humor

Always behave like a duck- keep calm and unruffled on the surface, but paddle like the devil underneath. ↗

— Jacob M. Braude

#composure #humor #humor

Maybe I could be a ninja assassin too, Jack thought. ↗

— Jane Seville

#humor

Hey, rock dude, are you destroying the house? Causing mayhem? Who’s a ferocious gargoyle? Stoney’s a ferocious gargoyle. ↗

— Devon Monk

#humor

I confronted the fact that I was not only talking to a dog, but answering for one. ↗

— Claire Cook

#humor #humor

Young people, however, tend to ignore the customs of their elders. Adolescent rebellion has been responsible for all manner of absurd costumes. The more ridiculous a certain fashion is, the more adolescents will cling to it. ↗

— David Eddings

#fashion #humor #humor

Cyclones cannot see you if you don't move" "That's dinosaurs you crazy fruit bat! ↗

— G. Norman Lippert

#humor

I'd like to think they're staring at me because of my white-hot animal magnetism, but I'm not Elvis. I'm Lobster Boy, hear me roar. ↗

— Richard Kadrey

#sex-appeal #humor