#iq

A blanket could be used to reduce the weight of love, by exactly one person. It’s a cold world out there. 
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

I make love like a brick could be used as toilet paper. Sure, it’s rough, but I thought you liked that shit.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

I make love like I sell sausages to strange women. One at a time, and always covered with a condom (to keep the flies away). 
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A blanket could be used to fix your broken marriage. You’ll also need duct tape, an empty car trunk, a getaway driver, and the most opportune moment to snatch your mother-in-law away to never be seen or heard from again. 
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

Hey wedding DJ, there is no way in hell I'm paying you $1,000 when all you're doing is plugging your iPod into the sound system #AHOLE ↗

— Andy Ostrom

#dance #dj #etiquette #marriage #wedding

Monique, I realize that it's a short list of men in this town you haven't tied up, held down or sent to the free clinic, but why don't you just leave Leo alone. At least until he can update his vaccinations. ↗

— Barbra Annino

#stacy-justice #vaccinations #men

Generally speaking, it is injudicious for ladies to attempt arguing with gentlemen on political or financial topics. All the information that a woman can possibly acquire or remember on these subjects is so small in comparison with the knowledge of men... ↗

— Samuel Orchar Beeton

#humor #victorian #men

If you ask Muslim women why they cover up, ninety-nine percent of them will say it's to avoid arousing men. Fuck that, where's your self-accountability? ↗

— Michael Muhammad Knight

#feminist #hijab #islam #islamic-feminism #niqab

I used to murder people for money, but these days it’s more of a survival technique. ↗

— Jennifer Estep

#money #murder #pro-bono #summary #survival

Bricks could be used to line the pockets of the politicians, the way the people’s money once was, as we drop them off to search for Atlantis.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #money