#is

The thing is, that world doesn't exist. All growing up means is that your realize no one will come along to fix things. No one will come along to save you. ↗

— Elizabeth Scott

#hate-you #love #love-you #miss-you #love

Go forth and mutilate fish. ↗

— Janice Hardy

#humor #the-shifter #humor

What happened, then? You're stomping through every puddle you can find and look like you're going to punch the first person you see." "Why are you hanging around, then? Aren't you worried about getting hit?" "Aw, you'd never hurt me. My face is too pretty ↗

— Richelle Mead

#funny

And as for you, Gaelen is your uncle, your mother's beloved brother. He's your family. Learn to get along with him. You don't have to like him, but you might want to consider the fact that he's walked the earth more than twice as long as either of your parents, and he's spent the last thousand years battling the enemies of the Fey. He's probably forgotten more Fey skills than you've ever learned. ↗

— C.L. Wilson

#humor #family

If you wish to serve me, as you have bloodsworn yourself to do, you must do so with honor. And that does not include introducing yourself by name to people like my mother in order to terrify them into submission.” "Kem'falla—" Gaelen protested. "Don't bother to deny it," she snapped. ↗

— C.L. Wilson

#humor #terrifying #humor

Imagine no limitations; decide what's right and desirable before you decide what's possible. ↗

— Brian Tracy

#wisdom #imagination

What difference does it makehow old I am when I shall never grow any bigger? ↗

— Miss Piggle Wiggle

#humor #miss-piggle-wiggle #myself #truth #humor

Good evening, gentlemen!' said the vampire. 'Please pay attention. I am a reformed vampire, which is to say, I am a bundle of repressed instincts held together with spit and coffee. It would be wrong to say that violent, tearing carnage does not come easily to me. It's not tearing your throats out that doesn't come easily to me. Please don't make it any harder. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#humor #vampires #humor

He was trying to conjure up a succubus." It should be impossible to leer when all you've got is a beak, but the parrot managed it. "That's a female demon what comes in the night and makes mad passionate wossn-" "I've heard of them," said Rincewind. "Bloody dangerous things." The parrot put its head on one side. "It never worked. All he ever got was a neuralger." "What's that?" "It's a demon that comes and has a headache at you. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#discworld #humor #humor

Mealtime "A mousie squealing in a trap Woke me from my morning nap. Wasn't he so very sweet To tell me it was time to eat?" (From A CAT'S GARDEN OF VERSES) ↗

— Henry N. Beard

#humor #robert-louis-stevenson #humor