#jack

Hermes gazed up at the stars. "My dear young cousin, if there's one thing I've learned over the eons, it's that you can't give up on your family, no matter how tempting they make it. It doesn't matter if they hate you, or embarrass you, or simply don't appreciate your genius for inventing the Internet-" "You invented the Internet?" It was my idea, Martha said. Rats are delicious, George said. "It was my idea!" Hermes said. "I mean the Internet, not the rats. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#george #hermes #humor #internet #martha

In Jacksonville, there are more childrenless children than fatherless children. Barely. But that’s one bad thing that’s actually a good thing. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#family #father #florida #funny #humor

The fusty showman fumbles, must Fit in a particle of dust The universe, for fear it gain Its freedom from my cube of brain. Yet dust bears seeds that grow to grace Behind my crude-striped wooden face As I, a puppet tinsel-pink Leap on my springs, learn how to think— Till like the trembling golden stalk Of some long-petalled star, I walk Through the dark heavens, and the dew Falls on my eyes and sense thrills through. ↗

— Edith Sitwell

#poem #springing-jack #freedom

Right," she said, "We're going to the Land of the Dead and I shouldn't think negative. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor #negative #percy-jackson #positive #underworld

I stared at him (Dionysus). "You're...you're married? But I thought you got in trouble for chasing a wood nymph- ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor #hypocrite #percy-jackson #humor

You know how teachers tell you the magic word is 'please'? That's not true. The magic word is 'puke'. It will get you out of class faster than anything else. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#percy-jackson #puke #funny

I love New York. You can pop out of the Underworld in Central Park, hail a taxi, head down Fifth Avenue with a giant hellhound loping along behind you, and nobody even looks at you funny. Of course, the Mist helped. People probably couldn't see Mrs. O'Leary, or maybe they thought she was a large,loud,very friendly truck. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#new-york-city #percy-jackson #funny

Hercules,huh? Percy frowned. "That guy was like the Starbucks of Ancient Greece. Everywhere you turn--there he is. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#percy-jackson #humor

Reyna looked at Percy without much hope. “You do have a plan?” Percy wanted to step forward bravely and say, No, I don’t! ↗

— Rick Riordan

#percy-jackson #percy-jackson-and-the-olympians #plans #reyna #the-heroes-of-olympus

Don't tell me you fell something for the little . . . oh.' The vampire blinked, then curled his lip back, disgust and pity crossing his sharp features. 'Oh, sister. Really? That's just sad. ↗

— Julie Kagawa

#jackal #humor