#ka

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas. ↗

— Johnny Carson

#christmas #early #lose #mail #office

People's real hopes and dreams can be distorted and misdirected and packaged until you're not sure what you really want or what you even really need. ↗

— Tracy Chapman

#dreams #even #hopes #misdirected #need

We were in the same band, but we're two completely different people. People have asked me to make comparisons with our albums, and I can't, because there's no comparison. Her album's okay. I don't think she's the best singer on Earth, but she's okay. ↗

— Melanie Chisholm

#albums #asked #band #because #best

We continue to be exasperated by the view, apparently gaining momentum in certain circles, that armed robbery is okay as long as nobody gets hurt! The proper solution to armed robbery is a dead robber, on the scene. ↗

— Jeff Cooper

#armed #certain #circles #continue #dead

A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.' ↗

— Tommy Cooper

#back #bad #bad back #doctor #got

Skating everywhere is unpredictable, no amount of money or facilities is going to create a skating star. You have to have a skater who is dedicated, passionate, and willing to learn. ↗

— Robin Cousins

#create #dedicated #everywhere #facilities #going

Ice dance should not be seen as a rigid conformist form of figure skating. There is a great deal of freedom and originality to be had. ↗

— Robin Cousins

#dance #deal #figure #figure skating #form

Production was what I always wanted to do, even when I was skating. I'm a bit of a sponge. When I was going around competing I was always asking, 'What does that light do?' If you want to be successful, you have to understand what people are doing around you. ↗

— Robin Cousins

#around #asking #bit #competing #does

Unless we make Christmas an occasion to share our blessings, all the snow in Alaska won't make it 'white'. ↗

— Bing Crosby

#alaska #blessings #make #occasion #our

Absolute faith can blind you to the consequences of the actions you allow. It can tell you it's okay to drop bombs on another country, or that it's okay to hate a group of people such as homosexuals. ↗

— Andrew Denton

#actions #allow #another #blind #bombs