#kidnapped

I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof. ↗

— Rodney Dangerfield

#finger #i #i remember #kidnapped #more

Being born is like being kidnapped. And then sold into slavery. ↗

— Andy Warhol

#born #into #kidnapped #like #slavery

When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room. ↗

— Woody Allen

#i #into #kidnapped #out #parents

We had some problems - my children were kidnapped during that time, and it just changed my whole way of thinking, from being in show business and everything else. ↗

— Solomon Burke

#business #changed #children #during #else

The other day I woke up to find my girlfriend already gone from the house, and a sticky note on the fridge that said, "I love you." "Oh my God," I thought. "Somebody's obsessed with me, and they kidnapped my girlfriend just to get closer to me. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#god #kidnapped #love #obsession #funny

He's looking for the president's kidnapped daughter; everybody he calls on to help him is busy, but lo and behold, you look across the room, and I'm waiting for that action. ↗

— Derek Luke

#action #behold #busy #calls #daughter

He was very concerned about his children potentially being kidnapped or attached, and that's why they were covered up. When he went to Berlin zoo, there were 200 photographers. ↗

— Martin Bashir

#attached #being #berlin #children #concerned

She’s not showing any interest in me and she looks like she doesn’t want to be here. Should I take off her handcuffs? I thought kidnap victims were supposed to fall in love with their captors?
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#fall-in-love #handcuffs #interest #kidnap #kidnapped

The best birthday present I ever got from my grandpa was a skinny black tie. It didn’t come in a bag, a box, or even rolled up in tissue paper. It came wrapped in wisdom. As soon as he gave it to me he said, “A tie would make a stronger impression on your boss if you used it as a blindfold and kidnapped him. That‘s why I bought you a black one. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#blindfold #funny #kidnapped #wisdom #funny

She doesn’t even have shoes on” He was trying to reconcile something in his head while talking to Luke. “In all the time you spent in that shack, you forgot to pack her shoes?” Luke asked rhetorically, shaking his head in both wonder and disappointment. “Look, we’re in the boonies. I am sure shoes are optional, as are a full set of teeth. ↗

— Jenna-Lynne Duncan

#kidnapping #louisiana #new-orleans #paranormal #young-adult