#kids

Kids. You gotta love them. I adore children. A little salt, a squeeze of lemon--perfect. ↗

— Jim Butcher

#humor #kids #storm_front #humor

If your kid needs a role model and you ain't it, you're both fucked. ↗

— George Carlin

#kids #parenting #role-models #humor

I am charging you with the protection of my mother and friends, not to mention keeping my younger self off the Internet. He is as dangerous as Opal. ↗

— Eoin Colfer

#humor #internet #kids #teenagers #time-travel

My new apartment might be a place where there are lots of children. They might gather on my porch to play, and when I step out for groceries, they will ask me, "Hi, do you have any kids?" and then, "Why not, don't you like kids?" "I like kids," I will explain. "I like kids very much." And when I almost run over them with my car, in my driveway, I will feel many different things. ↗

— Lorrie Moore

#kids #humor

I've got nine kids, nine dogs, three grandkids - and one in the oven. And three parrots! ↗

— Michael Landon

#got #grandkids #i #kids #nine

If kids six and under eat free, then I’m an infant. Or at least infantile. Bring on the steaks.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#cheap #cheater #children #dinner #discount

Only the family, society's smallest unit, can change and yet maintain enough continuity to rear children who will not be "strangers in a strange land," who will be rooted firmly enough to grow and adapt. ↗

— Salvador Minuchin

#family-relationships #kids #love #change

The cactus thrives in the desert while the fern thrives in the wetland. The fool will try to plant them in the same flowerbox. The florist will sigh and add a wall divider and proper soil to both sides. The grandparent will move the flowerbox halfway out of the sun. The child will turn it around properly so that the fern is in the shade, and not the cactus. The moral of the story? Kids are smart. ↗

— Vera Nazarian

#cactus #child #children #clever #desert

My kids are growing up and it's hard to accept they are their own person and they're independent. ↗

— Ray Romano

#growing #growing up #hard #independent #kids

Kids have awkward moments. ↗

— Kenan Thompson

#kids #moments