#lan

Of course, tax revenues have ended up being substantially higher than they were at the time these dire projections were made, and we are very close now to having a balanced budget. All that has been very helpful. ↗

— Charles Vest

#balanced budget #been #being #budget #close

All this twaddle, the existence of God, atheism, determinism, liberation, societies, death, etc., are pieces of a chess game called language, and they are amusing only if one does not preoccupy oneself with 'winning or losing this game of chess. ↗

— Marcel Duchamp

#chess #god #language #life #religion

These Kingsguard knights are as useless as nipples on a breastplate. ↗

— George R.R. Martin

#lannister-sense-of-humor #humor

Kahlan ambled toward the door. "Well, my breasts aren't as large as yours Berdine." She slowed as she passed Raina. "I think Raina's hands would fit mine better. ↗

— Terry Goodkind

#humor #kahlan #raina #humor

Reed: "What's up?" Vanessa: "There must be an accident or something." Reed: "I'm the accident." Vanessa: "I couldn't agree more." Reed: "What I meant was, those people out there are waiting for me. ↗

— Jenny O'Connell

#jenny #o-connell #plan-b #reed #vanessa

Gwen Cassidy needed a man. Desperately. Failing that, she'd settle for a cigarette. ↗

— Karen Marie Moning

#highlander #humor #humor

He leaned close, rubbing his bearded cheek against my ear. 'And how about a sweet kiss, now, for the brave lads of the clan MacKenzie? Tulach Ard!' Erin go bragh,' I said rudely, and pushed with all my strength. ↗

— Diana Gabaldon

#outlander #humor

The End of the Raven "On a night quite unenchanting, when the rain was downward slanting I awakened to the ranting of the man I catch mice for. Tipsy and a bit unshaven, in a tone I found quite craven, Poe was talking to a Raven perched above the chamber door. 'Raven's very tasty,' thought I, as I tiptoed o'er the floor. 'There is nothing I like more.' [...] Still the Raven never fluttered, standing stock-still as he uttered In a voice that shrieked and sputtered, his two cents' worth -- 'Nevermore.' While this dirge the birdbrain kept up, oh, so silently I crept up, Then I crouched and quickly leapt up, pouncing on the feathered bore. Soon he was a heap of plumage, and a little blood and gore -- Only this and not much more. ↗

— Henry N. Beard

#edgar-allan-poe #humor #raven #humor

By some miracle, Charlotte's polite smile never wavered. It was a proud moment for her. After all, it wasn't every day that a little old lady told you right to your face that your bosom was as flat as a flounder. ↗

— Olivia Parker

#historical #humor #regency-england #to-wed-a-wicked-earl #humor

What did you say, Arthur?" "I said, how the hell did you get here?" "I was a row of dots flowing randomly through the Universe. Have you met Thor? He makes thunder." "Hello," said Arthur. "I expect that must be very interesting." "Hi," said Thor, "it is. ↗

— Douglas Adams

#humor #nonchalance #humor