#lan

We have our own language. Christianese... We don't say 'He's out of his mind,' no, we say 'That's our youth pastor. ↗

— Tim Hawkins

#humor #language #humor

Nick could see the gun shaking in Alan's hand now, in tight, terrified spasms. "Last night we put a magician in the river," Alan said, his voice low and intense as if he was making a promise."Maybe we should send you to join him." "You know the rules," the woman whispered. "Don't shoot the messenger." Nick interrupted, leaning down to speak in her ear. "Do they say 'Don't cut the messenger in half with your great big sword'? ↗

— Sarah Rees Brennan

#humor #nick #humor

Plan. Yes. Good idea. I should come up with a plan. ↗

— Steven Brust

#plan #vlad-taltos #humor

Of course, tax revenues have ended up being substantially higher than they were at the time these dire projections were made, and we are very close now to having a balanced budget. All that has been very helpful. ↗

— Charles Vest

#balanced budget #been #being #budget #close

All this twaddle, the existence of God, atheism, determinism, liberation, societies, death, etc., are pieces of a chess game called language, and they are amusing only if one does not preoccupy oneself with 'winning or losing this game of chess. ↗

— Marcel Duchamp

#chess #god #language #life #religion

These Kingsguard knights are as useless as nipples on a breastplate. ↗

— George R.R. Martin

#lannister-sense-of-humor #humor

Kahlan ambled toward the door. "Well, my breasts aren't as large as yours Berdine." She slowed as she passed Raina. "I think Raina's hands would fit mine better. ↗

— Terry Goodkind

#humor #kahlan #raina #humor

Reed: "What's up?" Vanessa: "There must be an accident or something." Reed: "I'm the accident." Vanessa: "I couldn't agree more." Reed: "What I meant was, those people out there are waiting for me. ↗

— Jenny O'Connell

#jenny #o-connell #plan-b #reed #vanessa

Gwen Cassidy needed a man. Desperately. Failing that, she'd settle for a cigarette. ↗

— Karen Marie Moning

#highlander #humor #humor

He leaned close, rubbing his bearded cheek against my ear. 'And how about a sweet kiss, now, for the brave lads of the clan MacKenzie? Tulach Ard!' Erin go bragh,' I said rudely, and pushed with all my strength. ↗

— Diana Gabaldon

#outlander #humor