#lawyer

A lawyer, a politician, and a prostitute walk into a bar, and the bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve your kind here.” And I’d have to agree. Serves them right for being so sleazy. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #lawyer #politician #prostitute #sleazy

When a criminal breaks into your home I'll let the liberals call the lawyer. I'm going to call Smith & Wesson. ↗

— Rick Perry

#breaks #call #criminal #going #home

I didn't want to play a lawyer. I didn't want to play a doctor. I didn't want to play a single dad. I wanted to do something I felt I could learn from, something that would be a challenge and something that would not dry up. ↗

— William Petersen

#could #dad #doctor #dry #felt

Obviously if you are an accountant, a criminal lawyer, a president, or a senator, or if you work in a funeral parlor, you have to wear a tie, but more and more people are wearing very casual clothes. ↗

— Jean Pigozzi

#casual #clothes #criminal #funeral #lawyer

The lawyer has not reached the height of his vocation who does not find therein... scope for a peculiar but genuine artistic function. ↗

— Frederick Pollock

#does #find #function #genuine #height

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings... and lawyers. ↗

— Richard Pryor

#deal #feelings #lawyers #marriage #really

A lawyer with his briefcase can steal more than a hundred men with guns. ↗

— Mario Puzo

#guns #his #hundred #lawyer #men

I am being embezzled by a monstrous ring of accountants, estate planners and lawyers who are mercilessly slandering me and trying to kill my career and, I believe, murder me in order to gain control of my royalties. ↗

— Randy Quaid

#am #being #believe #career #control

Lawyers (are) operators of the toll bridge across which anyone in search of justice has to pass. ↗

— Jane Bryant Quinn

#anyone #bridge #justice #lawyers #operators

We are Americans. We - we - we are - we are doctors. We are investment bankers. We are taxi drivers. We are store keepers. We are lawyers. We are - we are part of the fabric of America. And the way that America today treats its Muslims is being watched by over a billion Muslims worldwide. ↗

— Feisal Abdul Rauf

#bankers #being #billion #doctors #drivers