#magic

Aha," Andrea said. "I'm going to ignore that you just referred to yourself as 'sugar woogums'. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#ilona-andrews #kate #magic-slays #sugar-woogums #ilona-andrews

Although I was able to maintain a pleasant expression, I was mentally throwing up in her face. ↗

— Augusten Burroughs

#humor #magical-thinking #humor

Please, let me take you home. You’re drunk.” “I am not.” I shoved him, spilling some kind of delicious poison on him. “Go home and have a wild time with Ms. Scarlet. In the bedroom. With the—” “Okay, you’re starting to talk board game. Let’s go home, babe. I’ll get you into bed. ↗

— Rachael Wade

#hoodoo #magic #paranormal-romance #romance #the-gates

I live in a world without magic or miracles. A place where there are no clairvoyants of shapeshifters, no angels or superhuman boys to save you. A place where people die and music disintegrates and things suck. I am pressed so hard against the earth by the weight of reality that some days I wonder how I am still able to lift my feet and walk. ↗

— Katja Millay

#magic #weight #music

Corrival looked around. 'So is this it? Is everyone here? Erskine, maybe you should start the ball rolling. I have places to go and things to do.' 'Me?' Ravel asked. 'Why do I have to start it? You're the most respected mage here. You start it, or Skulduggery.' Skulduggery shook his head. 'I can't start it. I don't like most of these people. I might start shooting. ↗

— Derek Landy

#gathering #grudges #humor #humorous #mages

You know, I preferred you as an evil monk. Would have made killing you a whole lot easier. ↗

— Chris d'Lacey

#firestar #humor #killing #magic #monks

How did you hear about that?' 'Are you kidding me? So far, I had that runt Kyle-' 'I hate him. I hate all vamps. That complete toad, Michael-' '-tell me you were pregnant by a vamp-' 'kidnnaped me and-Kyle said WHAT?' 'and then a member of the Domi shows up and informs me-' 'The Domi sent someone HERE?' '-that you're actually pregnant by the late king of the Fey.' 'Late?!' Heidar squeaked. ↗

— Karen Chance

#damphir #dorina #fey #fiction #humor

Magic is the only honest profession. A magician promises to deceive you and he does. ↗

— Karl Germain

#humor #illusionists #illusions #magic #magicians

You can't wish for more wishes or for vague generalities like happiness that are impossible to grant. Your wish has to be something specific enough that I can use my wand to make it happen. Oh, and recently there's been a ban on inserting yourself into the Twilight series. The Cullens are tired of different teenage girls pinging into their story every time they turn around. ↗

— Janette Rallison

#magic #twilight #wishes #humor

We do not need magic to change the world, we carry all the power we need inside ourselves already: we have the power to imagine better. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#harvard-commencement-speech #imagination #magic #change