#men

And besides . . . I don’t want to leave you. Er, you guys.” He smiled, and it lit up his whole face. “Well, ‘we’ are certainly happy to hear that. Oh, and I’m also happy to watch our darling little love child dragon while you’re in St. Louis.” I grinned back. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#awww #contentment #conversation #humor #love

Harry," Bob drawled, his eye lights flickering smugly, "what you know about women, I could juggle. ↗

— Jim Butcher

#women #humor

Man...heats up like a lightbulb: red hot in the twinkling of an eye and cold again in a flash. The female, on the other hand...heats up like an iron. Slowly, over a low heat, like tasty stew. But then, once she has heated up, there's no stopping her. ↗

— Carlos Ruiz Zafón

#love #men #sex #women #humor

Most of the upper management of I.S. were undead. I always thought it was because the job was easier if you didn't have a soul. ↗

— Kim Harrison

#humor #management #humor

Put some clothes on, you weird, yellow-eyed, table-dancing, werewolf-training, cryptic, stare-me-right-in-the-eyes-and-don't-even-blink wench. ↗

— Jim Butcher

#humor #women #humor

Isabelle snorted, "All the boys are guy. In this truck, anyway. Well, not you, Simon." "You noticed," said Simon. "I think of myself as a freewheeling bisexual," added Magnus. "Please never say those words in front of my parents," said Alec. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#bisexual #cassandra-clare #city-of-lost-souls #funny #gay

We do need a system, and we do need you and your 'Bertos, and sometimes we need Sam to just come along and kick some ass. - Quinn ↗

— Michael Grant

#government #humor #money #humor

When I grow up, I'd like to be dangerous. ↗

— Kirsten Miller

#humor #humor

Yes...and I'm worried that if you get into the habit of making out with your instructors, you'll wind up making out with him too." "Don't be sexist. They could find me a female instructor." "In that case, you have my permission to make out with her as long as I can watch. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#clary-and-jace #humor #mrotal-instruments #romantic #humor

Welcome to Hell. Here's your accordion. ↗

— Gary Larson

#humor #satire #social-commentary #humor