#mo

If I could make it better I would,” he says. In some ways it’s a stupid, obvious thing to say, but the way he said it, so honest and simple like it’s the truest thing there is, makes the tears prick in my eyes. (Before I Fall) ↗

— Lauren Oliver

#love #truth #humor

Most books on witchcraft will tell you that witches work naked. This is because most books on witchcraft are written by men. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#sexism #humor

Well, if the excitement's over, I think I'll take a bath.' 'Wow. The harsh lifestyle of a succubus. I wish I had your job.' 'Hey, our side's always recruiting. You might need to be a little prettier to be an incubus, though. And a little more charming.' 'Untrue. Mortal women go for jerks. I see it all the time.' 'Touché. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#chp #humor

Atticus "What's this religion going to be called?" Oberon "Poochism" A:"and the name of this holy writ I will be typing for you?" O:"The dead flea scrolls: A Sirius Prophecy. ↗

— Kevin Hearne

#great-filk #humor

You know, I just had a thought," he drawled. "Is that a new occurence for you? Is your brain tingling?" Cash and Jen ↗

— Elle Kennedy

#humor

He and I have this... personality conflict. Namely, I think he should get a new one. ↗

— Scott Westerfeld

#humor

What if a pair of us head off on our own?" Nollin proposed, panting. "A small detachment might avoid detection." "It's a gamble," Ferrin said. "If the duo gets noticed, they'll be defenseless. Who'd you have in mind?" "Some key delegates," Nollin said. "Perhaps myself and Aram." Rachel shook her head. Evidently, Nollin had noticed the critical role Aram had played during the escape. Ferrin laughed openly. "Aram, you've been promoted to essential!" "I'm generally more appreciated at night," the big man grumbled. "I'm going to the table, Nollin." "Maybe we should all remain together," Nollin repented. ↗

— Brandon Mull

#brandon #humor #mull #rebellion #seeds

Not that I lack confidence in the outcome," Ferrin said, "but would you consider entrusting the piece of my neck to somebody who is not about to confront one of the most deadly beings in the world? ↗

— Brandon Mull

#brandon #humor #mull #rebellion #seeds

In a town like London there are always plenty of not quite certifiable lunatics walking the streets, and they tend to gravitate towards bookshops, because a bookshop is one of the few places where you can hang about for a long time without spending any money. ↗

— George Orwell

#bookshops #humor #london #lunatics #madness

The preface? Why would he waste time with the preface? Skip the preface and move on to the meat of the thing! ↗

— Kenneth Oppel

#horror #nerd-humor #oppel #this-dark-endeavor #humor