#mo

Bring the luggage in, Thomas,” Lucian ordered with a frown as he approached the front. “What about the girl?” Thomas asked with irritation. “That’s what I meant.” Lucian stepped through the open front doors of the house. ↗

— Lynsay Sands

#humor

A perfectly kept house is the sign of a misspent life. ↗

— Mary Randolph Cartier

#humor

Now I understand why King Stannis let the wildlings through the Wall. He means for us to eat them. ↗

— George R.R. Martin

#humor #stannis-baratheon #wall #wildlings #humor

Drop something?" he asked, trying to suppress a smile but failing miserably at the act. I nodded and smiled back at him sheepishly, unable to find my voice to respond in any other way. "Interested in locks, I see," he commented. I nodded again. "Well, here you go," he said, and he handed the book to me. I nodded. Oh crap, why did I just nod? Take the book! I screamed inside my head. Take it! I took it slowly. He kept looking at me, smiling. ↗

— Markelle Grabo

#humor #love #nerves #humor

It’s fifteen minutes until two when I arrive – just in time for the interview. I walk through the glass doors and into the lobby, which is also floor-to-ceiling glass and steel. This fascinates me, because buildings back in Portland are made of grass and mud. ↗

— Andrew Shaffer

#humor

There have been better attempts at marching, and they have been made by penguins. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#marching #humor

Life is about survival of the fittest, and Jersey is producing the master race. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#humor

My Hallway" remarked Lord Akeldama,"Has never seen such lively action. And That, my sugarplums, is saying something! ↗

— Gail Carriger

#hyperbole #humor

Safety tip. When you see smoke run, never wait for fire. ↗

— Danielle Sibarium

#safety #humor

Oh yes, I have learned much from Tremorlor, and so assume a like strategy. Silence, a faint mocking smile suggesting I know more than I do, an air of mystery, yes, and fell knowledge. None could guess my confusion, my host of deluded illusions and elusive delusions! ↗

— Steven Erikson

#humor