#mo

She remembered Grace telling her about Lorcan's evasiveness when she'd first joined the Noctourne-his ability to speak without saying anything, to talk in riddles. He's a conundrum, thought Cheng Li. A walking, talking conundrum ↗

— Justin Somper

#conundrum #humor #vampirates #humor

He peed on me! ↗

— Twisted Hilarity

#humor

Man, I didnt know anything like that was going to happen! Honest, Tex, he was on something. Holy cow! I really kid, I been doing this stuff for a year now and I never saw nobody pull a gun before! God Almighty! What if he hadnt missed!' -- Lem 'He didn't.' -- Tex 'What?' -- Lem 'I said he didn't miss. He shot me and it hurts like hell.' -- Tex ↗

— S.E. Hinton

#humor

Why, so you can charm my panties off again? ↗

— Jill Shalvis

#humor

I can’t chitchat and make breakfast at the same time. You could help, you know, instead of standing there like the Queen of England. Although you’re a lot better-looking. ↗

— Susan Elizabeth Phillips

#humor #funny

If you've never been in a dumpster coated with industrial waste while someone stabs you with a piece of sharpened rebar, then you probably wouldn't understand. ↗

— S.G. Browne

#sci-fi #humor

History is gossip that's been legitimized, and that's really the case when you get into some of the Roman historians. Wow! They'd be right at home on reality tv. ↗

— Esther M. Friesner

#humor #reality-tv #writing #humor

Gadfangled girl things, always robbed me of my common sense. ↗

— Bruce Coville

#humor

Laughter is the hand of God on the shoulder of a troubled world. ↗

— Grady Nutt

#inspirational #philosophy #humor

I visualized myself pulling on my mental thinking cap, jamming it down around my ears as I had taught myself to do. It was a tall, conical wizard's model, covered with chemical equations and formulae: a cornucopia of ideas. ↗

— Alan Bradley

#inspirational #intelligence #humor