#nice

What was that?" Rich combined the pain of a crooked arm with the indignity of a flicked ear. I could only hope the situation didn't escalate to the dreaded purple nurple. ↗

— Molly Harper

#funny #jane-jameson #molly-harper #nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs #purple-nurple

Some vampires wouldn't react if you shoved a rosary down their pants, though I wouldn't recommend testing the theory. ↗

— Molly Harper

#jane-jameson #molly-harper #nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs #vampire #funny

I offered you a choice, and you took it." I shot him what I hoped was a truly scathing glare. "Some choice. I was dying. Some drunk shot me from a pickup. Why wouldn't I have just woken up with gonorrhea like every other girl of loose moral fiber? ↗

— Molly Harper

#funny #gabriel #gonorrhea #jane-jameson #molly-harper

I grabbed my purse, which was conveniently place by the front door. Gabriel was such a considerate abductor/host. He even left the front door unpadlocked. ↗

— Molly Harper

#gabriel #jane-jameson #molly-harper #nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs #funny

Don't worry about being nervous. A lot of vampires have trouble with this from time to time. It happens to everyone." "If I was a forty-year-old man suffering from erectile dysfunction, that would be a great comfort to me, thanks. ↗

— Molly Harper

#erectile-dysfunction #funny #jane-jameson #molly-harper #nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs

To be fair to Monica," I said, "what you did to her wasn't very nice either." "What'd I do to her?" he asked, defensive. "You know, going blind and everything." "But that's not my fault," Isaac said. "I'm not saying it was your fault. I'm saying it wasn't nice. ↗

— John Green

#hazel-and-isaac #nice #the-fault-in-our-stars

I turned to Dionysus. "You cured him?" "Madness is my specialty. It was quite simple." "But...you did something nice. Why?" He raised and eyebrow. "I am nice! I simple ooze niceness, Perry Johansson. Haven't you noticed? ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor #madness #nice #percy-jackson #sarcasm

I wish I was your favorite girl, I wish you thought I was the reason you are in the world, I wish I was your favorite smile, I wish the way I dressed was your favorite kind of style ↗

— Kate Nash

#nice #potential #love

We didn't stow away!" Dan protested. "You sunk our boat and pulled us out of the canal!" "Good point," Ian agreed. "Return them to the canal. Roughly, please. ↗

— Gordon Korman

#dan-cahill #humor #ian-kabra #venice #humor

Be nice. And if you can't do that, just don't be mean. ↗

— Richelle E. Goodrich

#love #nice #richelle #richelle-goodrich #self-control