#ones

Hang your merit. I don't seek anyone's approbation. ↗

— Fyodor Dostoyevsky

#approval #black-humor #disapproval #dishonesty #funny

What you do is so loud, I can't hear what you say." Anonymous ↗

— Mike Addington

#character #honesty #truthful #wisdom #home

Anybody who says they are a good liar obviously is not, because any legitimately savvy liar would always insist they're honest about everything. ↗

— Chuck Klosterman

#always #any #anybody #because #everything

No one believes you’re serious until bodies start to fall. -Vlad ↗

— Jeaniene Frost

#cat #humor #night-huntress #vlad #humor

She led the way. Eyeless sockets of the dead seemed to stare at them as they passed. "These are cool," Dan decided. "Maybe I could-" "No, Dan," Amy said. "You can't collect human bones." "Awww. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#bones #collect #dan-cahill #humor #humor

Your mum pounced on her and started sucking away. Would’ve been arousing if not for all the screaming.” “Ian,” Bones drew out warningly. He grinned. “You’re right. I was aroused anyway. ↗

— Jeaniene Frost

#humor #ian #humor

Clary: What are you doing here, anyway? Jace: 'Here' as in your bedroom or 'here' as in the great spiritual question of our purpose here on this planet? If you're asking whether it's all just a cosmic coincidence or there's a greater metaethical purpose to life, well, that's a puzzler for the ages. I mean, simple ontological reductionism is clearly a fallacious argument, but- Clary: I'm going to bed. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#city-of-bones #clary-morgenstern #jace-wayland #mortal-instruments #age

Lucifer's bouncing balls, Kitten, not again!" Uh-oh. I squirmed, instinctively also trying to block Tony's body from his view. As if that made him any less dead. "She was going to stab you," I said in my defense. "Look in her hand!" He was looking at the ground near my feet instead. "Him, too?" I nodded, sheepish. "He jumped me." Bones just stared. "You're not a woman," he said finally. "You're the Grim Reaper with red hair! ↗

— Jeaniene Frost

#humor #humor

I got over shy a really long time ago. I'm queer, I'm feline, get used to it. ↗

— Andrea Speed

#humor #humor

You know,” OreSeur muttered quietly, obviously counting on her tin to let Vin hear him, “it seems that these meetings would be more productive if someone forgot to invite those two.” Vin smiled. “They’re not that bad,” she whispered. OreSeur raised an eyebrow. “Okay,” Vin said. “They do distract us a little bit.” “I could always eat on of them, if you wish,” OreSeur said. “That might speed things up.” Vin paused. OreSeur, however had a strange little smile on his lips. “Kandra humor, Mistress. I apologize. We can be a bit grim.” Vin smiled. “They probably wouldn’t taste very good anyway. Ham’s far too stringy, and you don’t want to know the kinds of things that Breeze spends his time eating….” “I’m not sure,” OreSeur said. “One is, after all, named ‘Ham.’ As for the other…” He nodded to the cup of wine in Breeze’s hand. “He does seem quite fond of marinating himself. ↗

— Brandon Sanderson

#marinating-oneself #humor