#or

Sure,” she said, and hugged the laptop bag closer. “What could go wrong?” Michael’s eyes flashed to meet hers in the rearview mirror. Besides everything, I mean,” she said. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#humor #morganville-vampires #humor

If you are good life is good. ↗

— Roald Dahl

#humor

You want sensitive and understanding, stick with the therapist.You want great, headbanging sex, get off the fucking phone and come with me. ↗

— Jennifer Crusie

#seduction #humor

I like to write when I feel spiteful. It is like having a good sneeze." (Letter to Cynthia Asquith, November 1913) ↗

— D.H. Lawrence

#spite #writing #humor

Your hair is still wet! ↗

— Justin Bieber

#interview #humor

See, you think I give a shit. Wrong. In fact, while you talk, I'm thinking; How can I give less of shit? That's why I look interested. ↗

— Justin Halpern

#humor

Between hello and goodbye is I love you.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#hello #humor #love #relationships #humor

I commend my soul to any god that can find it. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#moist-von-lipwig #humor

Is it really you this time, Kells?” “Well, I’m no maggoty corpse, if that’s what you mean.” He grinned. “That’s a relief. No maggoty corpse would be that sarcastic. ↗

— Colleen Houck

#humor

Can you define "plan" as "a loose sequence of manifestly inadequate observations and conjectures, held together by panic, indecision, and ignorance"? If so, it was a very good plan. ↗

— Jonathan Stroud

#plan #strategy #humor