#or

She narrowed her eyes and concentrated on his mouth. Name. He wanted her name. She had to think about it for a second before she remembered. Great. She must have hit her head. Which, duh, explained the headache. ↗

— Larissa Ione

#humor

Sin hacerle caso, acaricié cariñosamente el cabello de su yo inconsciente. —¡Te has dejado K.O. A ti mismo! ¿Aún recuerdas lo cruel que fuiste conmigo por eso? Gideon sonrió débilmente. —Sí, lo recuerdo —dijo—. Y lo siento de verdad. Pero ¿quién puede contar con que pase algo así? ¡Ahora ven de una vez! Antes de que ese tonto se despierte. Hace rato que ha entregado la carta. —Y, a continuación, soltó unas cuantas palabras francesas tras las que supuse que se ocultaban otras tantas maldiciones jugosas, porque recurrió varias veces, igual que su hermano antes, a la palabra merde. ↗

— Kerstin Gier

#humor

At least, you two have decent manners," says Effie as we're finishing the main course. "The pair last year ate everything with their hands like a couple of savages. It completely upset my digestion." ... My mother taught Prim and me to eat properly, so yes, I can handle a fork and knife. But I hate Effie Trinket's comment so much I make a point of eating the rest of my meal with my fingers. Then I wipe my hands on the tablecloth. This makes her purse her lips tightly together. ↗

— Suzanne Collins

#humor

You are going to hurl yourself into a windstorm so you can fly into a prison? Why don't you write that sentence down and read it? Then perhaps you would realize how insane you are. ↗

— Eion Colfer Airman

#humor #humor

Goodreads sports some of the social awkwardness of middle school. If you are looking for a friend, I promise no matter your background or book preferences I will be your friend. :) ↗

— Red Phoenix

#social-commentary #truths #humor

You're a fine fastidious young man, as proud as a lion, as gentle as a girl. You'd make a good catch for the devil. ↗

— Honoré de Balzac

#coolness #eloquence #humor #swagger #humor

My love disappeared, along with the evidence of her dead body.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#death #evidence #humor #love #murder

Raise a smile and lower stress ↗

— Benny Bellamacina

#life #philosophy #wisdom #humor

Do I look like a shallow Summer girl to you?' She tossed her silver hair, offended. 'I’m a Winter Court royal. I kill silly Summer flowerlets with frost when I yawn. ↗

— Vicki Keire

#seasons #supernaturals #humor

It felt like he’d been dragged through the nine circles of hell — by his testicles. ↗

— Kay Berrisford

#erotica #fantasy #humor #m-m-paranormal #m-m-romance