#p

I wonder what all those Chinese poets sound like in Chinese. I like their distilled quality. ↗

— Tom Verlaine

#distilled #i #i wonder #like #poets

Plan. Yes. Good idea. I should come up with a plan. ↗

— Steven Brust

#plan #vlad-taltos #humor

While Coach Hedge was having dinner on the foredeck, a wild pegasus appeared from nowhere,stampeded over the coach’s enchiladas, and flew off again, leaving cheesy hoof prints all across the deck. “What was that for?” the coach demanded. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#coach #humor #pegasus #humor

Of course, tax revenues have ended up being substantially higher than they were at the time these dire projections were made, and we are very close now to having a balanced budget. All that has been very helpful. ↗

— Charles Vest

#balanced budget #been #being #budget #close

To those who care about punctuation, a sentence such as "Thank God its Friday" (without the apostrophe) rouses feelings not only of despair but of violence. The confusion of the possessive "its" (no apostrophe) with the contractive "it's" (with apostrophe) is an unequivocal signal of illiteracy and sets off a Pavlovian "kill" response in the average stickler. ↗

— Lynne Truss

#humor #punctuation #writing #humor

The school made it very clear that women were entitled to positions of authority. That sense of entitlement allowed us to feel that we have a natural place in leadership in the world. That gave me a mental and emotional confidence. ↗

— Linda Vester

#authority #clear #confidence #emotional #entitled

With anal sex, I suggest you start gently. Find a slender midget. Or a member of Congress. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#anal-sex #congress #funny #humor #politics

I am tempted to incapacitate him with the hemlock and then castrate him.” Lena paled. “I don’t think that would be very wise,” she said. “And the only knife we own is what I use for the cooking. You’re not using that.” “I was planning on using a spoon,” Honoria replied. ↗

— Bec McMaster

#steampunk #wicked #humor

I suggest we depict penguins as callous and unfeeling creatures who insist on bringing up their children in what is little more than a large chest freezer. ↗

— Jasper Fforde

#penguins #humor

Generally I don't care about what people say. I have to be clear with myself. When everything goes well, people celebrate you, when you make mistakes people criticize you. ↗

— Sebastian Vettel

#care #celebrate #clear #criticize #everything