#politician

My girlfriend asked if I wanted to go see a politician give a speech on “Ethics”, and I said, Sure, I might enjoy a bit of stand-up comedy.
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— Jarod Kintz

#ethics #funny #humor #politicians #politics

The biggest problem was the politicians knew nothing about fighting a war. ↗

— R. Lee Ermey

#biggest #biggest problem #fighting #knew #nothing

Think of submitting our measure to the advice of politicians! I would as soon submit the subject of the equality of a goose to a fox. ↗

— Anna Howard Shaw

#equality #fox #goose #i #measure

I believe politicians should always remain realistic. ↗

— Eduard Shevardnadze

#believe #i #i believe #politicians #realistic

A job is like a politician struggling in the water. Be sure you hold it down.
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— Jarod Kintz

#drown #drowning #economy #funny #humor

Politics bores you?" Bronsen said. Julien smiled. "It does. Apologies, sir, and it is not that I haven't tried to be fascinated. But careful and meticulous research has suggested the hypothesis that all politicians are liars, fools, and tricksters, and I have as yet come across no evidence to the contrary. They can do great damage, and rarely any good. It is the job of the sensible man to try and protect civilization from their depradations. ↗

— Iain Pears

#damage #deceit #depradation #lies #politicians

I want to have five or six wives, and a few dozen sheep, all for my pleasure. I should be a politician. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#politician #politics #humor

... we shoved out many hopes and fears into their hands, believing those hands were strong because they had firm handshakes. They failed us, always. There was no way they could not fail us - they were human, and so were we. ↗

— Isaac Marion

#politicians #leadership

The captain of a ship can run a great ship, but he can't do anything about the tides. ↗

— Matthew Norman

#leaders #leadership #politician #politics #ship

Governments were only invented to give banks a medium of exchange. Politicians are the only universal currency. ↗

— Bauvard

#currency #funny #government #humor #money