#pseudonym

Chance is perhaps the pseudonym of God when he did not want to sign. ↗

— Anatole France

#did #god #perhaps #pseudonym #sign

No government ought to be without censors; and where the press is free, no one ever will. Chance is the pseudonym of God when he did not want to sign. ↗

— Anatole France

#chance #did #ever #free #god

Dear Disney Cruise Line, I would very much like to go on one of your cruises, but I have certain accommodations that need to be made before I book my trip. I need a room large enough to comfortably fit a king-size bed, as well as a king (Juan Carlos of Spain). Juan is afraid of people and will only come aboard incognito. He will be arriving in the costume of a small cat and answers to the pseudonym of “Mr. Fizzlebush.” He will need his litter box changed daily, the finest dry cat food, and fourteen bottles of your finest champagne (he is royalty, after all). His Majesty Juan Carlos is not to be touched, but should he decide to lick a crew member’s face, he or she will be expected to kneel and grovel at His Majesty’s paws. I hope you won’t turn your back on a royal customer. We look forward to sailing with you soon. Thank you, Jarod Kintz ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#cats #disney #funny #incognito #juan-carlos

Chance is the pseudonym of God when he did not want to sign. ↗

— Theophile Gautier

#did #god #pseudonym #sign #want

The owner of The Mandrake Hotel and Resort is a man called Rot, a billionaire like Bill Gates, only nerdier. 
 Rot Kugelschreiber isn’t the name he was born with. No, the name on his birth certificate is Dark Jar Tin Zoo. He chose that penname because in German it means Red Pen—and a Red Pen is mightier than a Red Sword, which in turn is mightier than a Rothschild. 
 Most of the time he goes by Rot, but occasionally he reverts back to Dark Jar Tin Zoo. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #pseudonym #funny