#pun

What the semicolon's anxious supporters fret about is the tendency of contemporary writers to use a dash instead of a semicolon and thus precipitate the end of the world. Are they being alarmist? ↗

— Lynne Truss

#english-language #grammar #humor #lynne-truss #punctuation

I've got a sweater.' Ben pulled off his coat and held it out for her. 'Here.' Thanks, Ben. It's lovely and warm.' Then she said, 'Ben, I-- I can tell you how I feel about-- about everything. I think you're the best friend I've ever had. I-- I'd lie down and die for you if you wanted me to.' Honey,' Ben said. 'When I get you to lie down for me it won't be to die. ↗

— Madeleine L'Engle

#spunky #humor

Steal not this book for fear of shame For on it is the owners name And when you die the Lord will say Where is the book you stole away And when you say you do not know The Lord will say go down below. ↗

— L.M. Montgomery

#humor #poem #punishment #stealing #humor

What sort of person," said Salzella patiently, "sits down and writes a maniacal laugh? And all those exclamation marks, you notice? Five? A sure sign of someone who wears his underpants on his head. Opera can do that to a man. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#opera #punctuation #humor

I like stories about supervillains. They teach children that you can accomplish great things even when the whole world is against you. ↗

— G.D. Falksen

#humor #humorous #inspirational #pulp-fiction #steampunk

I think they are a better race than humans ever were. ↗

— Angelo Tsanatelis

#cyberpunk #cyborg #genetic-engineering #science-fiction #intelligence

I comma square bracket recruit's name square bracket comma do solemnly swear by square bracket recruit's deity of choice square bracket to uphold the Laws and Ordinances of the City of Ankh-Morpork comma serve the public truƒt comma and defend the ƒubjects of his ƒtroke her bracket delete whichever is inappropriate bracket Majeƒty bracket name of reigning monarch bracket without fear comma favour comma or thought of perƒonal ƒafety semi-colon to purƒue evildoers and protect the innocent comma comma laying down my life if neceƒsary in the cauƒe of said duty comma so help me bracket aforeƒaid deity bracket full stop Gods Save the King stroke Queen bracket delete whichever is inappropriate bracket full stop. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#oath #punctuation #humor

Nin knew how much humans loved money, riches, and material things—though he never really could understand why. The more technologically advanced the human species got, the more isolated they seemed to become, at the same time. It was alarming, how humans could spend entire lifetimes engaged in all kinds of activities, without getting any closer to knowing who they really were, inside. ↗

— Jess C. Scott

#cyberpunk #elven-charm #humankind #insightful #life

The brightest light casts the darkest shadow. ↗

— Jess C. Scott

#books #cyberpunk #dark #dark-elves #ego

Life is like a roller coaster, live it, be happy, enjoy life ↗

— Avril Lavigne

#wonderland-rock-punk #life