#ran

I like your boyfriend," Dahra said. "Not many guys volunteer to carry ten gallons of diarrhea and vomit." Lana laughed. "He's not my boyfriend." "Yeah, well, he can be mine if he wants to be. He's cute. And he carries crap. ↗

— Michael Grant

#gone #humor #michael-grant #plague #humor

Taking a deep breath that smelled of rain, she was poised to move when a hand clasped her elbow. Memories of another hand grabbing her sent panic shooting through her veins. She swung around. "Whoa. You okay?" Lucas lightened his clasp around her arm. Kylie caught her breath and stared up at the werewolf's blue eyes. "Yeah. You just...surprised me. You need to whistle when you come up on me. ↗

— C.C. Hunter

#humor #kylie #lucas #paranormal #taken-at-dusk

Well. I think it's safe to say that, in my absence, the power grabbing and backstabbing and political intrigue has officially reached an all-time Otherworld high. ↗

— Lesley Livingston

#humor #unseelie #wondrous-strange #humor

Oh my!! How you've grown. Soon you'll be catching the Lord's balls. ↗

— Marjane Satrapi

#humor #memoir #young_adult #humor

Be nice. And if you can't do that, just don't be mean. ↗

— Richelle E. Goodrich

#love #nice #richelle #richelle-goodrich #self-control

A king without a Queen." Kian sighed, breathing mist into the air. He held me tighter, kissing me with a heat that seemed to thaw the very snow on which we stood. "You don't know me as well as you think you do," he said. "What I'm holding back. What I'm capable of. You haven't felt it - how much I love you... ↗

— Kailin Gow

#love

Are you watching the boats?" Cornelia guessed. She craned her neck to see if there was any excitement on the river. Heavens no, I'm spying on people," Virginia responded unrepentantly. -Cornelia E and Virginia Somerset ↗

— Lesley M.M. Blume

#blume #boats #cornelia #escapades #humor

New rules. If you are smart enough to live, you won’t hit Charles’s mate in front of his father. ↗

— Patricia Briggs

#anna-cornick #bran-cornick #charles-cornick #cry-wolf #defense

No,” said Hermione shortly. “Have either of you seen my copy of Numerology and Gramatica?” “Oh, yeah, I borrowed it for a bit of bedtime reading,” said Ron, but very quietly. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#hermione-granger #humor #out-of-character #quips #ron-weasley

You should go into every relationship as a brick and not a blanket. ↗

— Nicole McKay

#brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #humor #random