#rand

Teamwork is me helping you build a brick wall that will come between us and forever divide us. Division through unity.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be used for bric-a-brac. If you bring the brick, I’ll bring the brac.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be used as a hammer, which frees up the hammer to be used as a sex toy. The only question is, Which end will you insert? If you’re a politician, I’d recommend the one with the hooks.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

That’s a federal crime,” I told him. “Punishable by three to five years in a minimum-security prison. You’ll get passed around like condiments at a barbeque.” “My hole is already quivering,” he said. ↗

— T.J. Klune

#funny

A brick can be used as a counting device, particularly if you only need to count up to one.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

Never ask an elf for help; they might decide your better off dead, eh?" (Orik) (Eldest) (Page 207) ↗

— Christopher Paolini

#humor #ironic #random #humor

A brick could be used to help you become an Olympic swimmer. Tie the brick around your legs and have a friend drop you off someplace, say the middle of the Pacific Ocean, and then simply swim back to shore. By the time you hit the beach, you’ll be able to swim faster than a shark. In fact, you’ll have to if you plan on making it home.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. In other words, I want to get married. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#argue #arguments #chores #cynicism #desire

Are you in charge here?" the man asks. "No, but I'm full of ideas! ↗

— Dr. Who

#dr-who #funny #funny-and-random #ideas #management

I am better then most people in life. -Rustin Hieber ↗

— Ryan Higa

#humor #justin-bieber #nigahiga #random-quote #ryan-higa