#relationships

All the black leather she needs is the E-Z boy recliner where her love is parked with one of his hands wrapped around a remote, the other, a bottle of beer. She's right. It's kinky. The way he doesn't look away from the TV, as her head bobs in his lap like a fisherman's float on a nature program, hectic with the pace his breath sets. His crotch swells under her mouth's prowess. He's such a sweetheart he waits until the commercials to come. ↗

— Daphne Gottlieb

#relationships #love

I once loved a girl who almost loved me, but not as much as she loved John Cusack. ↗

— Chuck Klosterman

#love #relationships #humor

When someone leaves you, apart from missing them, apart from the fact that the whole little world you've created together collapses, and that everything you see or do reminds you of them, the worst is the thought that they tried you out and, in the end, the whole sum of parts adds up to you got stamped REJECT by the one you love. How can you not be left with the personal confidence of a passed over British Rail sandwich? ↗

— Helen Fielding

#bridget-jones #humor #humor-relationships #humor

Why?" She asked in a confused whisper. "Out of all the women in the world, why did you choose this mortal?" "Because fate drove me to you. ↗

— Charlotte Featherstone

#fate #love #relationships #love

It's hard to close the door on optimistic expectations when you love someone. ↗

— Dennis Lehane

#hope #love #relationships #love

Boyfriend huh? I didn't realize we had taken things to that level." "Oh, I'm sorry--this is my first undercover operation," Jordan said. "I'm a little unclear about the rules. Are we seeing other people in this fake relationship? ↗

— Julie James

#humor

He was uncomplicated and upbeat and easy. At one point, I might have thought these traits made him a simpleton, but now I think they just translate to happiness. ↗

— Emily Giffin

#humor

Basically, all women are nurturers and healers, and all men are mental patients to varying degrees. ↗

— Nelson DeMille

#men #men-and-women #mental-illness #relationships #women

If she happens to fall, I'll be there to laugh at first and then help her up afterwards. ↗

— J.A. Redmerski

#humor

I suppose you're right about some perspectives. Just a few weeks ago, I thought you were a dickhead. ↗

— Mary E. Pearson

#humor