#ren

I have to tell you, Arty, a screw up this early in the proceedings doesn’t exactly fill me with confidence. I hope you’re as clever as you keep telling everyone you are.” “I never tell anybody exactly how clever I am. They would be too scared... ↗

— Eoin Colfer

#fantasy #humor #humor

He looked the boy up and down as if he had never seen a child before and wasn't quite sure what he was supposed to do with one: eat it, ignore it or kick it down the stairs. ↗

— John Boyne

#humor #humor

Will you accompany me in this dance?” he said, bowing and holding out his hand. “No, thank you.” Miri smiled. The prince frowned and looked and the chief delegate as if for assistance. Miri laughed self consciously. “I, uh, I was teasing. ↗

— Shannon Hale

#fantasy #humor #romance #humor

There's a Drunk Midget in My House Ah, babies! They're more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts. Like most people who have had one baby, I am an expert on everythiing and will tell you, unsolicited, how to raise your kid! ↗

— Tina Fey

#humor #parenthood #humor

She just threatened to throw the next man who shoots at you out the window. Megan is awake. She offered to help. God, Trent, what is it with you and women? ↗

— Kim Harrison

#into-the-woods #jenks #the-hollows #trent-kalamack #humor

There's only one person who needs a glass of water oftener than a small child tucked in for the night, and that's a writer sitting down to write. ↗

— Mignon McLaughlin

#humor #writers #writing #humor

The difference between a top-flight creative man and the hack is his ability to express powerful meanings indirectly. ↗

— Vance Packard

#between #creative #creative man #difference #express

The BALLPOINT PENGUINS, black and white, Do little else but write and write. Although they've nothing much to say, They write and write it anyway.... ↗

— Jack Prelutsky

#humor #poetry #humor

Children in the abstract, had never appealed to me. They seemed to be loud creatures, often dripping some form of goo. ↗

— Stephenie Meyer

#humor #humor

Good call, Bob. ↗

— Jan Thomas

#humor #humor