#s

Everyone has crap in their background, everyone has things they wish they could undo. But most people don't go around doing their best to screw up their present lives because of it. ↗

— Nicholas Sparks

#inspirational #humor

My name is Nicomo Cosca, famed solider of fortune, and I am here for dinner. ↗

— Joe Abercrombie

#humor #humor

Accept that some days you’re the bug, and some days you’re going to be the windshield. ↗

— Jill Shalvis

#humor

Kids are baby goats. They're cute and they have redeeming social value. You are definitely not kids. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#goats #humor #kids #humor

You know how to pray, don’t you? Just put your hands together and hope. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#humor

There's also way too much religion in the South to be consistent with good mental health. Still, I love traveling down there, especially when I'm in the mood for a quick trip to the thirteenth century. I'm not someone who buys into all that 'New South' shit you hear; I judge a place by the number of lynchings they've had, overall. ↗

— George Carlin

#south #humor

The only moral it is possible to draw from this story is that one should never throw the Q letter into a privet bush, but unfortunately there are times when it is unavoidable. ↗

— Douglas Adams

#hitchihikers #humor #philosophy #humor

She was a thin woman in a mustard-yellow suit, with a yellowish complexion, short-cropped rusty red hair, and a stiff posture. She reminded Reynie of a giant walking pencil. ↗

— Trenton Lee Stewart

#the-mysterious-benedict-society #humor

Reyna looked at Percy without much hope. “You do have a plan?” Percy wanted to step forward bravely and say, No, I don’t! ↗

— Rick Riordan

#percy-jackson #percy-jackson-and-the-olympians #plans #reyna #the-heroes-of-olympus

Cheer Up the worst is yet to come! ↗

— Barbara Johnson

#inspirational #humor