#shoe

I had a dream about you last night. We started a shoe company, and a competitor (probably someone from Nike) attacked you, so I had to stab them in the throat with a shoelace. I guess it would have been better to use that shoelace to strangle them. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#competition #competitor #dream #dreams #night

All the kids with fancy shoes or clothes, do you know what I got with a family of nine? When ever we said let's play poker, we had a full team of adults right there. ↗

— Julia Marriott

#fancy #fun #funny #kids #laugh

Women need food, water, and compliments That's right. And an occasional pair of shoes. ↗

— Chris Rock

#women #food

The question is not "can you wear your father's shoes?". The question is "can you walk in your father's shoes?". It is one thing having a mentor and it is another thing to become like your mentor. ↗

— Israelmore Ayivor

#apprentice #copy #excel #excellence #extra

I want to write a book about shoes that’s full of footnotes. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #shoes #write #writing-a-book #funny

She couldn't help thinking that something was wrong with a person had more shoes than books in their home. ↗

— Victoria Connelly

#bookworms #chick-lit #girly #humour #reading

Somebody left a pair of baby shoes on a bench. I would have taken them home, if only they weren’t too big for my feet.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#baby-shoes #bench #bizarre #feet #funny

Not every man has shoes, so reduce the number of shoes at your home till every man has at least one! ↗

— Mehmet Murat ildan

#home

I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, "Got any shoes you’re not using? ↗

— Steven Wright

#humor #shoes #humor

Peter! Were you looking for a horse-shoe?" "No; I was expecting the horse, but the shoe is a piece of pure, gorgeous luck." "And observation. I found it." "You did. And I could kiss you for it. You need not shrink and tremble. I am not going to do it. When I kiss you, it will be an important event -- one of those things which stand out among their surroundings like the first time you tasted li-chee. It will not be an unimportant sideshow attached to a detective investigation. ↗

— Dorothy L. Sayers

#horse-shoes #horses #humor #importance #kisses