#si

How very scared I was of everything, and in the end how very scared I was of her. This woman I knew, and did not know, and loved. ↗

— James Christie

#autism #buffy-the-vampire-slayer #drusilla #juliet-landau #rain-man

Just because I'm no jaw clacker doesn't mean there should be a ruction put up whenever I have sommat to say. ↗

— Tamora Pierce

#mastiff #silence #humor

I have forgiven Jesus for all of the love he placed in me, when there's no one I can turn to with this love. ↗

— Morrissey

#lyrics #music #humor

You are well aware of your effect on women, and I'm sure it gratifies you no end to watch them sigh and salivate over your magnificent physique. I do not wish to spoil your fun, Dain, but I do ask you to consider my pride and refrain from embarrassing me in public." Women...sighing and salivating...over his magnificent physique. Maybe the brutal bedding had destroyed a part of her brain. ↗

— Loretta Chase

#jessica-trent #romance #humor

A certain man once lost a diamond cuff-link in the wide blue sea, and twenty years later, on the exact day, a Friday apparently, he was eating a large fish - but there was no diamond inside. That’s what I like about coincidence. ↗

— Vladimir Nabokov

#humor #insightful #humor

‎You cannot correct an old person every time they say something offensive. You would never make it through Thanksgiving dinner! ↗

— Stephen Colbert

#humor #inappropriate-remarks #offensive-remarks #humor

Even I, as sick as I am, I would never be you. Even I, sick and depraved, a traveler to the grave, I would never be you. ↗

— Morrissey

#lyrics #music #humor

If you talk bad about country music, it's like saying bad things about my momma. Them's fightin' words ↗

— Dolly Parton

#humor #music #humor

As Hazel marched down the hill, she cursed in Latin. Percy didn’t understand all of it, but he got son of a gorgon, power-hungry snake, and a few choice suggestions about where Octavian could stick his knife. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#hazel-levesque #humor #insults #octavian #percy-jackson

Now let me teach you another thing about my daughter. I love her very much but she has the ability to hide as expertly as a sock in a washing machine. No one knows where it goes, just as no one knows where she goes, but at least when she decides to come back, we're all here, waiting for her. ↗

— Cecelia Ahern

#missing #humor