#si

God save King Pendragon, May his reign long drag on, God save the King. Send him most gorious, Great and uproarious, Horrible and hoarious, God save our King. ↗

— T. H. White

#classic #humor #pendragon #humor

...there occurred to me the simple epitaph which, when I am no more, I intend to have inscribed on my tombstone. It was this: "He was a man who acted from the best motives. There is one born every minute. ↗

— P.G. Wodehouse

#insightful #humor

Well, fame is a drug and when you take it away from an addict, things can get ugly. ↗

— Melissa Jo Peltier

#reality-tv #satire #television #humor

possibly, mrs. laird...i'd say. except he's dead, you see. well, not completely dead. he's more of a resurrected god. he judges mortal spirits and feeds the hearts of the wicked to his pet monster.oh, and he has blue skin. i'm sure he'd make quite an impression on career day, for all those students aspiring to grow up and become ancient egyptian deities ↗

— serpent's shadow Rick Riordan

#osiris #sadie-kane #humor

Granny Weatherwax was not a good loser. From her point of view, losing was something that happened to other people. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#losing #humor

You've got an awfully kissable mouth. ↗

— F. Scott Fitzgerald

#flapper #humor #kiss #kissing #kissing-quotes

Sometimes if you have a difficult decision to make, just stall until the answer presents itself. ↗

— Tina Fey

#humor #humor

The Challenge is to pry Bertie loose from Dain and his circle of oafish dengenerates,” Jessica said severely. “It would be far more profitable to pry Dain loose for yourself,” said her grandmother. “He is very wealthy, his lineage is excellent, he is young, strong, and healthy, and you feel a powerful attraction.” “He isn’t husband material.” “What I have described is perfect husband material.” said her grandmother. “I don’t want a husband.” “Jessica, no woman does who can regard men objectively. And you have always been magnificently objective. ↗

— Loretta Chase

#jessica-trent #romance #humor

Does it hurt now?" he asked, his tone rough and seductive. "No." She shook her head again and sighed, trying to pretend his touch didn't make her uncomfortably wet. He grinned. "So...what's with the heavy breathing? ↗

— Eden Summers

#humor #passion #humor

But had I accepted the pickle juice, I would be drinking pickle juice right now. ↗

— Nicki Minaj

#inspirational #music #nickiminaj #humor