#ss

The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#giving #greed #greedy #humor #receive

Principled hate is a hell of a lot stronger than "Boy, I wish you hadn't mummified me and thrown me into the lake" hate. ↗

— John Green

#humor #humor

The long flight from Georgia to England had been pretty uneventful. Exceept that Cal had sat next to me. Which was fine. Really. It wasn't like I'd been hyperaware of his presence and jumped the three times his knee bumped mine. And adter that third time, he definitely hadn't shot me a kind of disgusted look and said, "Chill out, will you?" And when Jenna gave us both a quizzical look, we hadn't snapped, in unison, "Nothing!" Because all of that would have been weird, and Cal and I weren't weird. We were cool. ↗

— Rachel Hawkins

#humor

Do you love him?" There were only a few people in the world who could ask me such insanely personal questions without getting punched. Dimitri was one of them. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#humor #kick-ass #rose-hathaway #vampire-academy #humor

I feel like I could be the best, but I’m not going to openly admit that. At least not to any of my clones. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#clone #funny #humor #funny

If there is one thing I dislike, it is the man who tries to air his grievances when I wish to air mine. ↗

— P.G. Wodehouse

#selfishness #humor

Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. ↗

— Ronald Reagan

#bad #book #disgrace #many #politics

A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of one who has searched for the leak in life's gas-pipe with a lighted candle. ↗

— P.G. Wodehouse

#humor #melancholy #wit #humor

I like to think I'm helping them by hating them. I'm reminding them that they aren't God's gift to humankind. ↗

— Veronica Roth

#sassy #humor

I sent a quick text to Adrian: I have a hickey! You can’t ever kiss me again. I honestly hadn’t expected him to be awake this early, so I was surprised to get a response: Okay. I won’t kiss you on your neck again. So typical of him. No! You can’t ever kiss me ANYWHERE. You said you were going to keep your distance. I’m trying, he wrote back. But you won’t keep your distance from me. I didn’t dignify that with a response. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#aftermath #freaking-out #hickey #humor #kisses