#v

Form a sacred bond. That way if your government one doesn't get repaid, you'll have something to pawn. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #lover #funny

I never forget things. I just don't observe them in the first place. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #observation #funny

There’s a name for devout people who worship reverence. Heretics. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #heretics #humor #funny

Love is simple, if you allow it to be simple." Julian to Hannah, Take A Chance ↗

— Alison Wong

#chinese #england #english #funny #love

I wouldna cross the road to see a scrawny woman if she was stark naked and dripping wet. ~Jamie Fraser ↗

— Diana Gabaldon

#funny #jamie-fraser #outlander #scotland #skinny

Remind me to show you the latest e-mail from Courtney," he said now, kicking at a rock on the sidewalk. "You won't believe how many different incorrect ways she spelled hors d'oeuvres within the span of a single paragraph. ↗

— Aimee Agresti

#hors-d-oeuvres #spelling #funny

You see, unlike most writers today, I do not use a computer. I write the old-fashioned way: on the walls of caves. ↗

— Cuthbert Soup

#caves #computer #funny #old-fashioned #writer

Ah college years, those were the days. Pure freedom ... leaving home for the first time…the parties…” "What about the tutorials, the lectures, the large building with all the books called the ‘library’?” “Is that what those were?” Gerry blithely replied. ↗

— E.A. Bucchianeri

#college #colleges #funny #humor #humour

Dentistry is a precondition to love at first sight. Relationships are no longer about pulling teeth, but bleaching. That's why when your eyes meet, she beams with happiness - but when you smile back she shows her true reflexes. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #love #smiling #teeth

I’m trying to decide whether to tell you two to get a room or go barf in the trash can,” Emma said. “I’m leaning toward the second choice. You are both getting way too weird. And gross.” Cal barked out a laugh and slid his fingers down my arm to entwine with mine. His touch, and Emma’s comments, only made me blush more. Looks like Emma saw Cal lick my face after all. Now that wasn’t awkward or anything. ↗

— E.J. Stevens

#emma #funny #legend-of-witchtrot-road #paranormal-romance #quirky