#vamp

Vampires, bringing America together! ↗

— Charlaine Harris

#vampires #family

If we adopted Jack," I quip, "we'd have to give him combat pay for an allowance ↗

— Daven Anderson

#family #humor #vampire #family

As the middle child of the Laurel Canyon Adams Family, Whit was surprisingly chill on the subject of ampire-vays. ↗

— Beth Bloom

#funny #humor #pig-latin #silly #vampire

I'm starved." -Juli "How can you be starved? You just ate a huge bowl of popcorn." -Elspeth "Popcorn isn't food, it's popcorn." -Vicki ↗

— Lynsay Sands

#food #immortals #sisters #vampires #food

Stop using him, and start protecting him. I know he thinks he doesn't need it, but sometimes he does. Sometimes we all do. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#family #frank-collins #ghost-town #growing-up #morganville-vampires

Don't run I never liked fast food ↗

— Rachel Caine

#humor #vampires #food

I'm just being practial. I knew someday I might have to bare my throat to you. Pete and I discussed that very possibility. As for the danger and risk taking, that's what Pete pays me to do. And you and I both know he inteneds to get his money's worth." Jasmine, I cannot-" Why not!" Because you are not food!" I stared at him for a minute; the I started to grin. I couldn't help it. Vayl"-I tried to keep my face straight- "I'm not asking you to eat me. ↗

— Jennifer Rardin

#humor #vampires #food

Couldn’t you hypnotize her or something?" "It doesn’t work like that." "I thought vampires were all sex gods with the ladies." Cade looked at him. "What gave you that idea?" "Uh ... late-night TV, mostly ..." "Humans are our food. Do you want to have sex with a cow? ↗

— Christopher Farnsworth

#vampire #food

Also, vampires don't eat food. You never get to eat chocolate again. Ever. I'd rather die. ↗

— Sarah Rees Brennan

#human #vampire #food

Henry held up his taco- formerly Vlad's- and grinned. " Little known fact, gentlemen. Tacos are the food of genius." pg248 Henry to Vlad & Joss ↗

— Heather Brewer

#henry #humor #joss #tacos #vampire