#vic

Room service? Send up a larger room." [A Night at the Opera] ↗

— Groucho Marx

#hotels #humor #room-service #humor

Be sure to lie to your kids about the benevolent, all-seeing Santa Claus. It will prepare them for an adulthood of believing in God. ↗

— Scott Dikkers

#atheism #childhood #humor #kids #parenting

Rule of life. If you bother to ask someone’s advice, then bother to listen to it. ↗

— Sophie Kinsella

#humor #life #humor

I really hate threesomes when one of the participants is dead. ↗

— Jordan Castillo Price

#jordan-castillo-price #m-m-paranormal #victor-bayne #humor

There’s a general rule that I always go by, and it’s that you fall for who you fall for. Whatever small issue you get hung up on, whether it’s because they’re shorter than you, younger than you or they live far away - if you really are crazy about someone, none of that matters. ↗

— Taylor Swift

#relationship-advice #taylor-swift #love

Here is how you know if it is love or lust. Push them in front of a bus. If you jump in the way and save them it is love. ↗

— Teresa Mummert

#love #lust #relationships #love

And stop talking in that puffed-up way they taught you. Words aren't brains, you know. ↗

— Deepak Chopra

#humor #humor

What the fuck happened to you? [...] You look like you lost a fight with a lamprey. Hickey, hickey...bruise, bruise, bruise...bite. I thought that thing on your neck the other day was just a fluke. I guess not--looks like you get off on picking up a few souvenirs when you...get off. ~Crash ↗

— Jordan Castillo Price

#hickey #humor #vic #humor

Oh, for God's sake," I said. "Just give me the stupid thing." I took the panic button and stuck it into my Super Sexy Miracle Bra. "GPS," Ranger said to Morelli. "Probably I can find her breast without it," Morelli said. "But it's good to know there's a navigational system on board if I need it. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#navigational-devices #sexy #humor

It's impossible to walk through solid rock... You have to walk between the molecules that make up the rock. ↗

— J.M. Dattilo

#humor #life #philosophy #reality #science-fiction