#w

...If you'd like to go back in there and try kicking him, I recommend aiming upward and a bit to the left-- ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#will-herondale #humor

Master Griffin, I would marry my own mother for the excuse to stab my eyes out with her brooches than to see anything under your kilt," the man's voice said with an elegant aplomb. "Where would you like your guest's things, sir? ↗

— Tiffany Reisz

#witty #humor

We laughed together. It’s so lovely laughing with a man. It feels positive. Relaxed… ↗

— James Lusarde

#erotica #humor #laughter #love #men-and-women

It's great, because different groups of kids can laugh at each other and still enjoy the show. ↗

— Daisy Berkowitz

#different #each #enjoy #great #groups

Everyone buckled in?" Sasha snorted, then gaped as he realized Jess wasn't joking about it. "Really?" Is there anyone here one hundred percent human? No. I think dying from an unbuckled belt is the least of our concerns right now." "And I don't put it in drive until everyone's secure. That means you, wolfboy." Sasha's exasperated expression was priceless. "Unfrakkin'-believable. I'm in hell. With a lunatic. Might as well have stayed with Zarek. Next thing you know, you'll be drowning pancakes in syrup, too." He made a grand showing of buckling himself in. "Hope you get fleas" he mumbled under his breath. "Thank you." Jess pulled out of the garage. She pressed her lips together to keep from laughing at them. No doubt they'd take turns beating on her if she did. Curling his lip, Sasha sarcastically mocked his words in silence. "By the way, cowboy, you do know that if we were to wreck, I can teleport out of this thing right?" "Is Scooby still bitching?" Jess asked Choo Co La Tah. "Remind me to check his vet record when we get back. I think he might have distemper or rabies or something. ↗

— Sherrilyn Kenyon

#sasha #sundown #humor

Resolve to be thyself: and know that he who finds himself, loses his misery. ↗

— Matthew Arnold

#himself #his #know #loses #misery

We think a wise person is someone who solves problems. Truth is, a wise person is someone who avoids problems. ↗

— Prem Rawat

#fulfillment #happiness #humor #inspirational #success

The statement ‘There is nothing more American than an Indian’ happens to be a multidimensional paradox. Try and not say too many of those. That might open your mind to ideas that could cause sanity point loss. ↗

— Charles Slagle

#inspirational #life #love #philosophy #poetry

Anakin.” Obi-Wan’s voice had gone soft, and his hand was warm on Anakin’s arm. “There is no other Jedi I would rather have at my side right now. No other man.” Anakin turned, and found within Obi-Wan’s eyes a depth of feeling he had only rarely glimpsed in all their years together; and the pure uncomplicated love that rose up within him then felt like a promise from the Force itself. “I… I wouldn’t have it any other way, Master.” “I believe,” his onetime Master said with a gently humorous look of astonishment at the words coming out of his mouth, “that you should get used to calling me Obi-Wan. ↗

— Matthew Stover

#obi-wan-kenobi #humor

Do not put statements in the negative form. And don't start sentences with a conjunction. If you reread your work, you will find on rereading that a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing. Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do. Unqualified superlatives are the worst of all. De-accession euphemisms. If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is. Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky. Last, but not least, avoid cliches like the plague. ↗

— William Safire

#humor #writing #humor