#w

There's only one person who needs a glass of water oftener than a small child tucked in for the night, and that's a writer sitting down to write. ↗

— Mignon McLaughlin

#humor #writers #writing #humor

It has been well said that an author who expects results from a first novel is in a position similar to that of a man who drops a rose petal down the Grand Canyon of Arizona and listens for the echo. ↗

— P.G. Wodehouse

#novels #writing #humor

I found myself suddenly jealous of the time when things were simple, when days centered on creek walks and tetherball, and your biggest worry was whether you'd have riding or sailing. There were no boys, there were no secrets or rumors, and there were no regrets. Not even fear of regret. There was just a best friend and endless hours to fill with Pixy Stix and laughing so hard you couldn't breathe. ↗

— Kathryn Williams

#growing-up #friendship

The difference between a top-flight creative man and the hack is his ability to express powerful meanings indirectly. ↗

— Vance Packard

#between #creative #creative man #difference #express

The good news is there's no devil. The bad news is there's no heaven. There's nothing. ↗

— Kerry Packer

#bad news #devil #good #good news #heaven

I don't know why anyone would be scared of a homeless person. The truly scary people are all the murder mystery writers. They spend all day thinking of the perfect plot on how to kill someone and get away with it. ↗

— Shannon L. Alder

#writers #humor

Roxy, stop being so obnoxious!" -Joy "I'm never obnoxious; I'm just concerned." -Roxy ↗

— Katie MacAlister

#concern #friendship #view-point #friendship

I also read about Heathcliff's unexpected three-year career in Hollywood under the name Buck Stallion and his eventual return to the pages of Wuthering Heights. ↗

— Jasper Fforde

#humor #wuthering-heights #humor

Did it fall out?" Leo asked. "Is she bald?" "No, not at all. It's just that her hair is...green." To look at Leo's face, one would think it was Christmas morning. "What shade of green?" "Leo, hush," Win said urgently. "You are not to torment her. It's been a very trying experience. We mixed a peroxide paste to take the green out, and I don't know if it worked or not. Amelia was helping her to wash it a little while ago. And no matter what the result is, you are to say nothing." "You're telling me that tonight, Marks will be sitting at the supper table with hair that matches the asparagus, and I'm not supposed to remark on it?" He snorted. "I'm not that strong." "Please, Leo," Poppy murmured, touching his arm. "If it were one of your sisters, you wouldn't mock." "Do you think that little shrew would have any mercy on me, were the situations reversed?" He rolled his eyes as he saw their expressions. "Very well, I'll try no to jeer. But I make no promises." Leo sauntered toward the house in no apparent hurry. He didn't deceive either of his sisters. "How long do you think it will take him to find her?" Poppy asked Win. "Two, perhaps three minutes," Win replied, and they both sighed. ↗

— Lisa Kleypas

#humor #experience

Erin: We get to beat the shit outta guys in those big puffy suits!!! I’ve always wanted to really kick the crap outta some guy’s nuts. Now I can do it guilt-free! Me: You’re a sick girl. Erin: Guilty as charged. :) ↗

— Tammara Webber

#girl-power #self-defense #texting #humor