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I defy anyone to produce any evidence that the word 'happy' has ever crossed my lips. I am not now, nor have I ever been, 'happy.' ↗

— Larry David

#any #anyone #been #crossed #defy

I don't like to be out of my comfort zone, which is about a half an inch wide. ↗

— Larry David

#comfort #comfort zone #half #i #inch

I guess I still feel that I'm a comedian; if I had to pick one thing that I feel like I could do, it would be that. That doesn't mean that I like it, but I feel that's what I am. ↗

— Larry David

#comedian #could #feel #guess #had

I gave a funny speech at my wife's birthday party, and I'm thinking, 'Hey, I've still got it.' ↗

— Larry David

#birthday party #funny #gave #got #hey

I think that for the most part, when I started doing comedy, it had become very commercialized. ↗

— Larry David

#comedy #commercialized #doing #had #i

I think we're all good and bad, but good's not funny. Bad is funny. Suppress the good and let the bad out, and then you can be funny. ↗

— Larry David

#funny #good #good and bad #i #i think

I'm not interested in closure. Some people just have heart attacks and die, right? There's no closure. ↗

— Larry David

#closure #die #heart #i #interested

If I tried to flirt with a woman and she didn't know who I was, she would run away. ↗

— Larry David

#flirt #i #i tried #know #run

It has to do - I think - with growing up in an apartment, with my aunt and my cousins right next door to me, with the door open, with neighbors walking in and out, with people yelling at each other all the time. ↗

— Larry David

#aunt #cousins #door #each #growing

It's not every day that you get to be affectionate around something, it just doesn't happen that often. ↗

— Larry David

#around #day #every #every day #get