#aliens

The thing that has impacted life on earth the most is life on mars. That’s where the government is storing all my clones.
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— Jarod Kintz

#clones #earth #government #life #mars

Humans invent an imaginary lover and put that mask over the face of the body in their bed. That is the tragedy of language my friend. Those who know each other only through symbolic representations are forced to imagine each other. And because their imagination is imperfect, they are often wrong. ↗

— Orson Scott Card

#buggers #love #pequeninos #relationships #species

We found the bathrooms, which were labeled 'Aliens' and 'Femaliens.' 'Finally,' I said to J.Lo. 'Here's a bathroom you're allowed to use. ↗

— Adam Rex

#humor #toilet #humor

I was on the floor. "Um, a little help?" Christopher put his hand down. Martini cleared his throat and Christopher's hand retracted. "I can handle it, thanks." "There's nothing amorous about pulling someone off the floor," Christopher muttered. "There is when I do it. ↗

— Gini Koch

#humor #sci-fi #humor

If only I had the speed that my alien boyfriend had, then I could just zip through my senior year and forget about distance and mom’s annoyingly great sense of hearing. But when said alien boyfriend was in my bed, I wanted nothing more than the opposite speed. I wanted to freeze time to keep everything just the way it was. ↗

— Magan Vernon

#humor #teen-romance #young-adult #humor

The whole telling part seemed a moot point now, but how could he explain what happened? Hey, honey, I’m an alien and apparently I just doused you with some radioactive loving! Wanna catch a movie? Yeah, not cool. ↗

— Jennifer L. Armentrout

#humor #humor

Do I really run like that?" (Kitty) "Yup," Martini confirmed. "Don't worry, I think it's sexy." "Thank God. I think I look like a cheetah on drugs. ↗

— Gini Koch

#humor #sci-fi #humor

Man has gone out to explore other worlds and other civilizations without having explored his own labyrinth of dark passages and secret chambers, and without finding what lies behind doorways that he himself has sealed. ↗

— Stanisław Lem

#closed-mindedness #discovery #humanity #ignorance #mankind

Ambulances were cool. “You just want to fondle my extraneous body parts,” I said to the EMT as I picked up a silver gadget that looked disturbingly like an alien orifice probe, broke it, then promptly put it back, hoping it wouldn’t leave someone’s life hanging in the balance because the EMT couldn’t alien-probe his orifices. ↗

— Darynda Jones

#humor #humor

What in the blue star-blazes did you see in Jason?" he asked, still forcefully but with his frustration and jealousy under better control. "For one thing, Djetth, he wasn't trying to kill me!" ("Marsh", heroine of Insufficient Mating Material) ↗

— Rowena Cherry

#aliens #fantasy #futuristic #humor #humour