#americans

Statistics say that a range of mental disorders affects more than one in four Americans in any given year. That means millions of Americans are totally batshit. but having perused the various tests available that they use to determine whether you're manic depressive. OCD, schizo-affective, schizophrenic, or whatever, I'm surprised the number is that low. So I have gone through a bunch of the available tests, and I've taken questions from each of them, and assembled my own psychological evaluation screening which I thought I'd share with you. So, here are some of the things that they ask to determine if you're mentally disordered 1. In the last week, have you been feeling irritable? 2. In the last week, have you gained a little weight? 3. In the last week, have you felt like not talking to people? 4. Do you no longer get as much pleasure doing certain things as you used to? 5. In the last week, have you felt fatigued? 6. Do you think about sex a lot? If you don't say yes to any of these questions either you're lying, or you don't speak English, or you're illiterate, in which case, I have the distinct impression that I may have lost you a few chapters ago. ↗

— Carrie Fisher

#crazy #illness #mad #madman #manic-depressive-ocd

At the unconscious level, Americans believe that good people succeed, that success is bestowed upon you by God. Your success demonstrates that God loves you. ↗

— Clotaire Rapaille

#americans #code #culture #divine #god

For their part, the savage men appear to spend an inordinate amount of time lounging around their lodges, smoking and gossiping among themselves...so that it occurs to me that perhaps our cultures are not so different after all: the women do all the work while the men do all the talking. ↗

— Jim Fergus

#may-dodd #native-americans #men

I've always been interested in the history of the West, our country and particularly as it relates to the Native Americans - the original Americans. ↗

— Beau Bridges

#been #country #history #i #interested

My town hall meetings are with friends and neighbors, fellow Americans. We engage. ↗

— Sheila Jackson Lee

#fellow #fellow americans #friends #hall #meetings

The Americans, who are the most efficient people on the earth, have carried [phrase-making] to such a height of perfection and have invented so wide a range of pithy and hackneyed phrases that they can carry on an amusing and animated conversation without giving a moment’s reflection to what they are saying and so leave their minds free to consider the more important matters of big business and fornication. ↗

— W. Somerset Maugham

#authors #british #humor #business

All Americans value the freedom of speech and the freedom of the press, and I believe this is essential for our continued way of life. But with this freedom comes responsibility. That responsibility has been abdicated here by some in the media and some in the government. ↗

— Steven Hatfill

#been #believe #comes #continued #essential

If aliens visit us, the outcome would be much as when Columbus landed in America, which didn't turn out well for the Native Americans. ↗

— Stephen Hawking

#columbus #landed #much #native #native americans

I have a very personal interest. I am a Miami-Dade voter. One of the issues is that my vote and so many other votes of women and African Americans in Florida are being discounted or discarded. I want my vote to count. ↗

— Patricia Ireland

#african americans #am #being #count #discarded

I believe all Americans who believe in freedom, tolerance and human rights have a responsibility to oppose bigotry and prejudice based on sexual orientation. ↗

— Coretta Scott King

#based #believe #freedom #human #human rights